With the help of a much smarter DBA, this has been solved. At some point, someone moved a system database on the system. Apparently, after you do this, you have...

Yes, I intend to go back and change that. I had some problems with the date format I was usings, so I switched to GETDATE() just to get some results....

This worked. Thanks very much.

thanks very much, I'll remote in and give it a shot.

I'm getting these errors when I run them on the remote distributor:

Server: Msg 208, Level 16, State 1, Line 5

Invalid object name 'syssubscriptions'.

Server: Msg 208, Level 16, State 1, Line...