I think you would have to do this from the code side. The user hits the php pages which authenticates them through ldap. You could change your connection string...

I would like to do some testing but I get this call often. Server a Runs slower than server b with the same query blah blah blah. Those...

SQL server does not do math(graphics, cure for cancer) it does IO. I have argued this with Microsoft many times when they say yeah but our indexes use parrell...

Unless you can convert the sid to something usable how does that help?