Why do people need to do this?

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Why do people need to do this?

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Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 1

Garadin (1/20/2009)
Michael Valentine Jones (1/20/2009)
In the end, does the reason why really matter?
We had a meeting where we objected to a project as complete waste time and money, and were trying to talk our boss out of it. The boss stopped the discussion and said “You know it’s stupid, I know it’s stupid, everyone knows it’s stupid. We’re being forced to do this, so we're doing it, and let’s just get it done”. Sometimes it’s just like that.
Ahh... The infamous "We all know it's dumb and wont' do what the person asking for it wants it to do, but uh... do it anyways" talk. Love that one.

Oh man... me too... that's when I break out the BIG pork chop launcher and try to talk my boss into actually growing a spine! 😛

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 2

RBarryYoung (1/20/2009)
Heh, maybe I shouldn't post after midnight. But sure, use it if it helps. 😛

Heh... gotta love it when you take the helmet off... right about midnight I'd say. 😛

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Garadin One Orange Chip Points: 29613 More actions · Answer 3

Jeff Moden (1/21/2009)
Garadin (1/20/2009)
Michael Valentine Jones (1/20/2009)
In the end, does the reason why really matter?
We had a meeting where we objected to a project as complete waste time and money, and were trying to talk our boss out of it. The boss stopped the discussion and said “You know it’s stupid, I know it’s stupid, everyone knows it’s stupid. We’re being forced to do this, so we're doing it, and let’s just get it done”. Sometimes it’s just like that.
Ahh... The infamous "We all know it's dumb and wont' do what the person asking for it wants it to do, but uh... do it anyways" talk. Love that one.
Oh man... me too... that's when I break out the BIG pork chop launcher and try to talk my boss into actually growing a spine! 😛

I actually had one of those talks just this afternoon =).

Seth Phelabaum

Consistency is only a virtue if you're not a screwup. 😉

Links: How to Post Sample Data[/url] :: Running Totals[/url] :: Tally Table[/url] :: Cross Tabs/Pivots[/url] :: String Concatenation[/url]

Lynn Pettis SSC Guru Points: 442467 More actions · Answer 4

Garadin (1/21/2009)
Jeff Moden (1/21/2009)
Garadin (1/20/2009)
Michael Valentine Jones (1/20/2009)
In the end, does the reason why really matter?
We had a meeting where we objected to a project as complete waste time and money, and were trying to talk our boss out of it. The boss stopped the discussion and said “You know it’s stupid, I know it’s stupid, everyone knows it’s stupid. We’re being forced to do this, so we're doing it, and let’s just get it done”. Sometimes it’s just like that.
Ahh... The infamous "We all know it's dumb and wont' do what the person asking for it wants it to do, but uh... do it anyways" talk. Love that one.
Oh man... me too... that's when I break out the BIG pork chop launcher and try to talk my boss into actually growing a spine! 😛
I actually had one of those talks just this afternoon =).

So, did you win or lose?

Garadin One Orange Chip Points: 29613 More actions · Answer 5

It's not "one of those talks" if you win =).

Seth Phelabaum

Consistency is only a virtue if you're not a screwup. 😉

Links: How to Post Sample Data[/url] :: Running Totals[/url] :: Tally Table[/url] :: Cross Tabs/Pivots[/url] :: String Concatenation[/url]

Lynn Pettis SSC Guru Points: 442467 More actions · Answer 6

Gotta be the optimist sometimes and hope someone wins at least once.

The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 7

I haven't scrolled through all 60 or so messages to see if this was mentioned so it may be redundant.

I sometimes get one-shot requests for a simple CSV file that someone can drop into an Excel spreadsheet. Say for example they want a list of all outstanding issues for all clients ranked by client, priority, and due date. If the CSV I produce contains a column like that to rank within client based on those criteria, they can use Excel autofilter to see only the top issue for each client, or the top 3 or the top 10. I've spent minimal time writing the query and they can play around with it to their heart's content without having to come back for a change.

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

Michael Valentine Jones SSC Guru Points: 64818 More actions · Answer 8

Lynn Pettis (1/21/2009)
Garadin (1/21/2009)
Jeff Moden (1/21/2009)
Garadin (1/20/2009)
Michael Valentine Jones (1/20/2009)
In the end, does the reason why really matter?
We had a meeting where we objected to a project as complete waste time and money, and were trying to talk our boss out of it. The boss stopped the discussion and said “You know it’s stupid, I know it’s stupid, everyone knows it’s stupid. We’re being forced to do this, so we're doing it, and let’s just get it done”. Sometimes it’s just like that.
Ahh... The infamous "We all know it's dumb and wont' do what the person asking for it wants it to do, but uh... do it anyways" talk. Love that one.
Oh man... me too... that's when I break out the BIG pork chop launcher and try to talk my boss into actually growing a spine! 😛
I actually had one of those talks just this afternoon =).
So, did you win or lose?

Just as a follow-up on my original post, we did the project. We had very low expectations for it meeting the business objectives (it was a sales support app), but actual sales performance fell many orders of magnitude below even the most pessimistic predictions and it was shutdown three days after going live.

It lives on in the annals of the company's IT lore as a legendary business-driven screw-up. We use it as the benchmark to measure other disasters.

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 9

Bob Hovious (1/21/2009)
I haven't scrolled through all 60 or so messages to see if this was mentioned so it may be redundant.
I sometimes get one-shot requests for a simple CSV file that someone can drop into an Excel spreadsheet. Say for example they want a list of all outstanding issues for all clients ranked by client, priority, and due date. If the CSV I produce contains a column like that to rank within client based on those criteria, they can use Excel autofilter to see only the top issue for each client, or the top 3 or the top 10. I've spent minimal time writing the query and they can play around with it to their heart's content without having to come back for a change.

Now, there's another idea. Thanks, Bob. Still, it doesn't quite fit what the original request was... using a parody of your example, the SomeType column in the original post at the beginning of this thread would end up being the "client"... the "rank" or sequence starts over due to the "physical order" (please... no hate mail... it's in quotes :P) of the data maintained by the rownum. Each client could get a rank of 1 more than 1 time in a given day or even a given minute.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 10

No hate mail here, but I do have one other thought, which again may have been covered and disposed of....

People (users, clients, developers who can't spell SQL) sometimes make very specific requests, thinking they are being helpful, but in fact imposing their ideas about how to solve a problem. When I get such requests, I make every effort to engage them and ask "What are you trying to accomplish?" instead of "What do you want?" When done with senstitivity and diplomacy it adds to your credibility within the organization. People rarely mind being shown a better way to solve their problem. And, if it saves me the effort of twisting queries to do unnatural acts, that's even better.

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 11

Yep... I do the same thing... except I've been solving the problem and then asking for a bit of feedback. Of course, once the cat's out of the bag, that bad boy just takes off never to return. Lately I've been asking why folks want to do something first (if it's not obvious or already explained) and then I have to really pull some teeth because the normal answer to "Why do you want to do this?" is... "It's a requirement." Heh... no-duh!? 😛 Then, the fun really begins.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Goldie Lesser SSCertifiable Points: 6155 More actions · Answer 12

Don't know if this helps, Jeff, but I found a post from a few months back that was asking to solve this problem.

The OP did not say why he needed to this, but perhaps you can ask him.

http://www.sqlservercentral.com/Forums/Topic590904-338-1.aspx

Garadin One Orange Chip Points: 29613 More actions · Answer 13

Ahh... and that one has a link to that "Performance and Integrity" thread. Of course, that particular issue is like 4 steps past this one in terms of WTF-itude.

Seth Phelabaum

Consistency is only a virtue if you're not a screwup. 😉

Links: How to Post Sample Data[/url] :: Running Totals[/url] :: Tally Table[/url] :: Cross Tabs/Pivots[/url] :: String Concatenation[/url]

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 14

Garadin (1/23/2009)
WTF-itude.

Heh... aswesome... new word for my IT dictionary... should be included in the definition of RBAR as a result of a set based programmer finding RBAR in code. 😛

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004339 More actions · Answer 15

ggraber (1/23/2009)
Don't know if this helps, Jeff, but I found a post from a few months back that was asking to solve this problem.
The OP did not say why he needed to this, but perhaps you can ask him.
http://www.sqlservercentral.com/Forums/Topic590904-338-1.aspx

O jeez... failing memory... is it "Gloria"?

And, thanks... that's one of the posts I was looking for.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)