@TrumpDBA!

  • Why would you need database advice from anywhere or anyone else?!

    https://twitter.com/trumpdba

    ETA: This post was probably written for Jeff:

    RBAR is more work. More work means MORE JOBS FOR AMERICA! Only I can do that.

    #MakeCursorsGreatAgain

    (no, I'm not trying to start a political discussion -- I just wanted to point out a funny site)

    -----
    [font="Arial"]Knowledge is of two kinds. We know a subject ourselves or we know where we can find information upon it. --Samuel Johnson[/font]

  • IMO, that account is hilarious. ๐Ÿ˜€

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • TRUNCATE TABLE PEOPLE.TRUMP

    ๐Ÿ˜Ž

  • Wayne West (4/25/2016)


    Why would you need database advice from anywhere or anyone else?!

    https://twitter.com/trumpdba[/url]

    ETA: This post was probably written for Jeff:

    RBAR is more work. More work means MORE JOBS FOR AMERICA! Only I can do that.

    #MakeCursorsGreatAgain

    (no, I'm not trying to start a political discussion -- I just wanted to point out a funny site)

    Someone took it down. I'm getting a "page doesn't exist" error. If it's because I don't have a twitter account, I'll never see it because I'll never have a twitter account. Trust me! I guarantee it! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • Ah... got in. The link had some strange characters at the end. Remove those and you're in. Heh... "Trust me! I Guarantee IT!" ๐Ÿ˜€

    I did get a really cool quote out of it. Granny used to say "Mind the Pennies and the Dollars will take care of themselves". I 'bout fell outa' ma chair when I saw...

    Trump DBA ?@TrumpDBA ยท Mar 6

    [font="Arial Black"]Prevent the downtimes and the uptimes will take care of themselves.

    [/font]

    Oddly enough, March 6th is Michelangelo's birthday. Remember that virus back in the '80s?

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • Yeah, I had a problem in the URL which I thought I'd fixed yesterday, turned out my fix was incomplete. It should now be good. That's what I get for never having had a proper test environmehnt. :hehe:

    Yeah, faint bells for the Michelangelo virus. That didn't hit us too hard. We narrowly avoided the I Love You virus: I told our network guy at 7am when it hit Slashdot and we went and unplugged the external port on our firewall. The City, which was our upstream connection, got hit HARD.

    Whoever is doing this TrumpDBA is doing quite a good job. I'm surprised at their expertise at those things DBA as Twitter lists their birthday as 1/1/1900, and everything on the Internet must be true, mustn't it? ๐Ÿ˜€ 116 year old DBAs: that should be an automatic MVP.

    -----
    [font="Arial"]Knowledge is of two kinds. We know a subject ourselves or we know where we can find information upon it. --Samuel Johnson[/font]

  • Jeff Moden (4/25/2016)


    Oddly enough, March 6th is Michelangelo's birthday. Remember that virus back in the '80s?

    I remember that I was born in the 80's ๐Ÿ˜€

    I only remember the Friday the 13th (Jerusalem) virus.

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • Oh man, I'm dying....

    I'm deeply religious. I believe a lot of things. One belief: separation of code and data.ย #MakeDataGreatAgain

  • I love @trumpdba. Follow him/her on Twitter for laughs.

  • Wayne West (4/25/2016)


    Why would you need database advice from anywhere or anyone else?!

    https://twitter.com/trumpdba

    ETA: This post was probably written for Jeff:

    RBAR is more work. More work means MORE JOBS FOR AMERICA! Only I can do that.

    #MakeCursorsGreatAgain

    (no, I'm not trying to start a political discussion -- I just wanted to point out a funny site)

    #MakeCursorsGreatAgain

    Who loves you? Oracle loves you!

    The more you are prepared, the less you need it.

  • He-he, this account is hilarious! As an european this had me laughing so hard:

    "Besides the firewall I'm working on a comprehensive foreign key policy. Going to use AMERICAN keys instead!"

    :-D:-D:-D

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