I got burned today at a SQL Server Interview!

  • Scary stuff. With such an exemplary health and safety record, what do you make of this...

    http://technology.newscientist.com/article/dn13459-disposable-nuclear-reactors-raise-security-fears.html

    A friend who left school in 1975 ("Confessions of an Old Git") to work at Sellafield (then Windscale)told of seagulls which used to land, swim and drink from an outside, open-air cooling tank - then deposit luminescent radioactive droppings on peoples' cars.

    “Write the query the simplest way. If through testing it becomes clear that the performance is inadequate, consider alternative query forms.” - Gail Shaw

    For fast, accurate and documented assistance in answering your questions, please read this article.
    Understanding and using APPLY, (I) and (II) Paul White
    Hidden RBAR: Triangular Joins / The "Numbers" or "Tally" Table: What it is and how it replaces a loop Jeff Moden

  • Chris Morris (3/13/2008)


    ...told of seagulls which used to land, swim and drink from an outside, open-air cooling tank - then deposit luminescent radioactive droppings on peoples' cars.

    That's nothing. We had shrimp the size of lobsters in ours. I was assured it was because it was warm water, not that it had any left over reactivity... :alien:

    I do know that the croc's really seemed to like them.

  • Holy FRIK! I subscribed to this post yesterday... my email box has so many notifications in it from in between yesterday and now. That is craaaazayyy! This string has become it's own IRC Channel.

  • Grant Fritchey (3/13/2008)


    I got hired once because I'd been in the Navy... that's as close as I've got to an "outside" talent getting me hired story... Jeez, that sounds pathetic.

    (Since we're beating this topic right into the ground) -

    That's essentially another one of those "know the company you're going for", or perhaps just dumb luck..:) Knowing (or perhaps taking that gamble) that "credential" would play well, then absolutely. I guess the resume writer's point was - if you're not dead sure it will play well, then drop the "extracurricular" stuff.

    And considering some of the stupid, nitpicky things I've heard which seem to go into why someone gets picked over someone else, military service is one of the LEAST pathetic reason.

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Your lack of planning does not constitute an emergency on my part...unless you're my manager...or a director and above...or a really loud-spoken end-user..All right - what was my emergency again?

  • Mike Menser (3/13/2008)


    Holy FRIK! I subscribed to this post yesterday... my email box has so many notifications in it from in between yesterday and now. That is craaaazayyy! This string has become it's own IRC Channel.

    Even better, lets summarize the topics covered.

    1) How to Lie your way throught an interview.

    2) How to fart your way into a job.

    3) How to Dress up as an RPG .... (fill in blank) and get a job.

    4) How to make pork chops.

    5) How to build a Real Warbow.

    6) How to build a crossbow that will penetrate a tree 12"

    7) How to get a job after you glow in the dark....

    Did I miss anything?

  • You forgot one:

    How to avoid getting pooped on with radioactive bird poop.

    And POSSIBLY:

    How to make the best shrimp you will ever eat in your LIFE!

  • Matt Miller (3/13/2008)


    Grant Fritchey (3/13/2008)


    I got hired once because I'd been in the Navy... that's as close as I've got to an "outside" talent getting me hired story... Jeez, that sounds pathetic.

    (Since we're beating this topic right into the ground) -

    That's essentially another one of those "know the company you're going for", or perhaps just dumb luck..:) Knowing (or perhaps taking that gamble) that "credential" would play well, then absolutely. I guess the resume writer's point was - if you're not dead sure it will play well, then drop the "extracurricular" stuff.

    And considering some of the stupid, nitpicky things I've heard which seem to go into why someone gets picked over someone else, military service is one of the LEAST pathetic reason.

    Oh dumb luck, I though for a mo you were introducing Paris Hilton to this thread.

    “Write the query the simplest way. If through testing it becomes clear that the performance is inadequate, consider alternative query forms.” - Gail Shaw

    For fast, accurate and documented assistance in answering your questions, please read this article.
    Understanding and using APPLY, (I) and (II) Paul White
    Hidden RBAR: Triangular Joins / The "Numbers" or "Tally" Table: What it is and how it replaces a loop Jeff Moden

  • Matt Miller (3/13/2008)


    ... military service is one of the LEAST pathetic reason.

    I absolutely agree!

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • Grant Fritchey (3/13/2008)


    That's why they call us glowy bubble-heads....

    Heh... I knew I liked you for some reason... I was the Sr. Ping Jockey forward of frame 52 on Thresher... errr... ummm... Permit class subs. SSN 604. Turned down "the hat" to be a civy.

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • Matt Miller (3/13/2008)


    Grant Fritchey (3/13/2008)


    I got hired once because I'd been in the Navy... that's as close as I've got to an "outside" talent getting me hired story... Jeez, that sounds pathetic.

    (Since we're beating this topic right into the ground) -

    That's essentially another one of those "know the company you're going for", or perhaps just dumb luck..:) Knowing (or perhaps taking that gamble) that "credential" would play well, then absolutely. I guess the resume writer's point was - if you're not dead sure it will play well, then drop the "extracurricular" stuff.

    And considering some of the stupid, nitpicky things I've heard which seem to go into why someone gets picked over someone else, military service is one of the LEAST pathetic reason.

    It was that second thing, I assure you.

    "The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
    - Theodore Roosevelt

    Author of:
    SQL Server Execution Plans
    SQL Server Query Performance Tuning

  • Jeff Moden (3/13/2008)


    Grant Fritchey (3/13/2008)


    That's why they call us glowy bubble-heads....

    Heh... I knew I liked you for some reason... I was the Sr. Ping Jockey forward of frame 52 on Thresher... errr... ummm... Permit class subs. SSN 604. Turned down "the hat" to be a civy.

    Oooh, sitting in those padded chairs basking in the AC, taking showers (when we let you have water)... That must have been the life. I too was on a Thresher... um, no, that other thing, SSN 606. It's razor blades now & good riddance.

    "The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
    - Theodore Roosevelt

    Author of:
    SQL Server Execution Plans
    SQL Server Query Performance Tuning

  • Heh... AC only if you were off station and the R-12's actually worked. We all know that Lithbro never worked in warm water off the Philipines... we spent 60 out of 90 days on a WestPack at 120+ degrees in the shack... poor nukes had it even worse except for one smart guy who put a fan near the MSW's. It's amazing how cool 95o seems when RC is at 130+.

    Yeah... 604 went to the blade factory, as well. You know you're getting old when you shave with a piece of your old boat.

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • You guys out on the front lines while I served 4 years in the Country Club (aka Air Force). All the best to you!

    😎

  • I don't know if I'd call poking holes in water the "front lines" but from what I saw of the AF, you guys had it pretty sweet.

    And Jeff, don't be talking down to my baby. I spent many, many, many, long hours keeping that lithium bromide soup happy. It really does put tuning queries into perspective.

    "The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
    - Theodore Roosevelt

    Author of:
    SQL Server Execution Plans
    SQL Server Query Performance Tuning

  • So Grant, do you happen to have the receipe for Chicken Chernobyl Stew?

    (@duck)

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

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