Getting Colorful

  • Comments posted to this topic are about the item Getting Colorful

  • Gooey - No real form but its out there.

    Fragile - Breathe on it and it will break.

    Flacid - It sort of does it but no hard and fast rules.

    Bare - No comments, what so ever, anywhere

    and my favourite

    Fish Finger code - So many i & j counters and re-use within the same code block as to obscure it's functionality. For those reading I&J produce a range of frozen fish products here in Oz, mainly made of fish lips and fins !

    There are a few more I could use but not recommended in an open forum.

    COdeOn

    😛

  • My favorite: Nearly finished

    Today, it's a state of my several projects :w00t:



    See, understand, learn, try, use efficient
    © Dr.Plch

  • Defensive coding : code that on all sides is safe, like always use else with if's, or check any results from for instance queries done on always filled tables.

    Its the best way to work when using lots of external sources for data or import files. Better slow code then a user who gets an Unhandled Exception message in a web browser 🙁


    Kindest Regards,

    Wim van den Brink

  • A favorite of mine, which comes from another SSC member was "Shelfware" (he also was fond of "assware")

    First is stuff that is purchased (often turnkey systems) for lots of $$ and sits on a shelf.

    We should all know what the second is. Hopefully none of us have delivered any of that, though...

  • "It's not rocket science!!"

    And most stuff isn't, but it's amazing how people complicate things. I use this phrase a lot.

    Along with my favorite when I am in Project Manager mode

    "I encourage freedom of speech, but it's not a democracy!"

  • My favourite of describing a whole system with its associated processes:

    "If this is a car, then it has wonky wheels, the tires are rundown beyond any legal limit, the paint is flaking and some pieces are held in place by duck tape. It makes 7 mpg [5 US mpg / 40 l / 100km] and needs 3 liters of oil on 60 miles. Oh and the windscreen is cracked."

    Simple analogies make so much fun to put some sense into managers.

  • Flangeware - where the code appears to have been lashed together by a family of Baboons

  • Demoware - software which can be used to build great-looking demos, but which is unsuitable for almost any real life application. eg. ASP .NET (rowrrrr)

  • an old favourite :

    "Spaghetti Coding" - code with no discernable structure or comments, loads of GO TO statements

    [for the older folk]

    "Black Hole" - a project that gets loads of time and resources poured into it, with no apparent outcome or progress.

    "gopher" - system bug that keeps popping up unexpectantly

  • Past the first hurdle of testing (i.e. it now compiles).

  • My company tends to refer to any interfaces we develop as "sticky stuff", since it glues to disparate systems together.

    Not related to the code as such, but more the people doing the designing; we have on occasion found analysts "needing to learn some joined-up thinking".

    Onionware stinks on multiple layers.

    Semper in excretia, suus solum profundum variat

  • One of my favorites replaces 'Bug' with the phrase, 'Undocumented Feature'.

  • QUACKWARE - Held together by duck tape...

  • PermaTemp

    As with most of the code in our company, it's a temporary solution that ends up being permanent. I usually get to fix it when it stops working long after whoever wrote it has left the company!

    ---------------------------------------------------
    No matter where you go, there you are.

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