September 25, 2010 at 2:49 pm
Comments posted to this topic are about the item Can Wives Shorten Work Hours?
September 27, 2010 at 2:29 am
In my spare time I run a website for a club and my webmistress's report at the AGM included thanks to my OH for his support , patience and for telling me to "Get off that *** computer" when he thought I needed a break. 🙂
September 27, 2010 at 3:09 am
not sure either wives can short the work hours or not but if they succeeded in this then definately your rest of the hours will be extended to either shopping or working for them without pay. 😀 😀 😀 😀
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Ashish
September 27, 2010 at 6:53 am
This is an interesting topic. I remember being 26 and reading about guys taking a year off from work to spend time with their families. I sort of idolized these guys and their 'proper' perspective on life and family. My wife was mortified at the idea. I realized later that context needed to be applied. These guys were working 80+ hours a week and NEVER saw their families and of course, because of the drive and the hours, had the $$ saved up to be able to trim away their normal extravagance from the budget and still function as a family. There was usually a bunch of savings from doing some things for themselves that they had to pay people to do because they were working. My wife reminds me of that time still and I have to remind her that I realized what I was missing and that I am not planning a sabbatical any time soon.
Of course, balance is the key here. We have heard this over and over, but the nature of our business is that we will have to stay late sometimes. Flexibility seems to be the growing trend in IT shops and perhaps the workplace in general so that the balance is easier to achieve. Working some or all from home cuts the commute way down and gives us back that time.
September 27, 2010 at 7:03 am
The fiancee makes coming home from a long day at the office enjoyable. The office makes coming back from a long weekend with the fiancee enjoyable! 😛
September 27, 2010 at 8:16 am
chrisn-585491 (9/27/2010)
The fiancee makes coming home from a long day at the office enjoyable. The office makes coming back from a long weekend with the fiancee enjoyable! 😛
Hopefully she's not reading this!
September 27, 2010 at 8:55 am
My husband knew when I was first starting out in this field that long hours were going to happen. When I went back to school to finish my degree while working those long hours, it got even worse, but he put up with it, knowing that end result would be worth it. I'm happy to say that after working 10 years where 3 out of 4 weekends and most weeknights were spent on-call and with implementations, I finally made the decision that the work/life balance was way out of whack. I left the company and have landed at another where the extra hours aren't even close to what I had previously...and the pay is 'commensurate' 😀 ... and the perks are pretty good, too. I paid my dues, learned as much as I could when I was at the other place, and it paid off. It's really nice to have my life back....
I work to live, not live to work.
September 27, 2010 at 10:01 am
Only we can shorten our work hours, our spouses can only give us a push.
In both the short and long term, it is about balance. Not just home and work, it is about the need to get ahead, make a living, enjoy your family, enjoy personal time, etc..
September 28, 2010 at 2:19 am
Ouch! That title was a major sexist faux pas. The disclaimer in the text as an afterthought didn't help much either.
September 28, 2010 at 8:18 am
I believe our spouses or significant others can and should make demands on us to reasonably reduce our work hours, simply because our work lives affect their lives (and the rest of our family) as well as our own health and happiness.
This is a quality-of-life issue which (ironically) affects our work performance, as well.
I've been in IT for over 22 years and have witnessed a steady increase in the numerous ways (not only "long hours") in which our work lives encroach upon and can negatively impact our personal lives, which predictably feed that negative energy right back into our work lives.
Myriad bogus emergencies and artificial deadlines almost always equate to (groan with me now) “mandatory over-time”. But when everything is urgent, NOTHING is urgent; otherwise, the very concept of “priority” loses all meaning.
I love IT and revel in the positive impact my work can have on my co-workers, company, and business partners; but something has gone wrong with the modern work dynamic such that, it has misaligned our priorities as humans and professionals.
The truth is that many times, these “brutal necessities” of mandatory overtime, the bullying and micromanagement, the resultant burnout and high turnover rates - are not necessary at all.
As Steve pointed out, most of us rise to the occasion when it’s really needed without having to be asked; but for “management” to consistently expect and demand this level of counterproductive, life-draining performance is, to me, tantamount to abuse.
We all make our own unique contributions to our respective situations – creativity, steadiness, speed of execution, nuanced system knowledge, in-depth technical expertise, people skills, persistence and will, and by putting in longer hours.
Many of us came to IT by way of other disciplines; we enjoy our work and take it seriously; we also cherish life-long learning, growth, and challenge – it keeps us young, vibrant, and vital.
Of all the positive attributes our employers and we desire in co-workers, working long hours consistently is the one that seems to have the least long-term staying power, and the one that takes the greatest toll on our ability to deal with complex problems. After all, there’s a reason why those smart fellows at CIA employ sleep deprivation as a “soft torture” technique. I digress...
If anyone needs to see the end-result of following the rock-round-the-clock trend to its logical conclusion, look no further than recent news reports about Asian workers falling asleep on the job or worse (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/10182824 , http://globalnation.inquirer.net/news/breakingnews/view/20080827-157168/11-Asian-workers-die-in-Dubai-fire, http://www.cellular-news.com/story/33972.php ).
Food for thought, to be sure.
~R-Epicurus
September 28, 2010 at 8:27 am
I think that this says it all for me:
Most professionals will stay late, pull the all-nighter, really help out when it's needed in a crisis. Just don't ask them to do it everyday.
Wayne
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server 2008
Author - SQL Server T-SQL Recipes
September 28, 2010 at 12:33 pm
WayneS (9/28/2010)
I think that this says it all for me:Most professionals will stay late, pull the all-nighter, really help out when it's needed in a crisis. Just don't ask them to do it everyday.
Ditto.
Other things are more important in life.
Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
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September 29, 2010 at 2:56 pm
I don't mind working extra hours when needed and my wife supports me in that. It is interesting how lots of companies expect their employees to work extra hours and not get paid for it. I lost one job when the interview went this way:
Them: We expect you to work 60- 80 hours weekly.
Me: Will I be paid for the extra time?
Them: No, you will be paid a salary for 40 hours. We require all our IT employees to work those hours.
Me: Are your employees really that bad that they can't do the work in 40 hour weeks?
I know that sometimes there are projects that can't wait until next week. Sometimes we have to put in extra hours without compensation. That's fine. But to be told that it is expected/required on a weekly basis without compensation is just wrong.
-SQLBill
September 29, 2010 at 3:01 pm
If you're currently working 80+ hour weeks for an extended period of time, (probably years) I see 2 possibilities: 1) The wife will either shorten the work hours or 2) the work hours will shorten the length of the marriage. :-D;-):-P:-):cool::hehe::w00t:;-)
In all seriousness, early in my career I was working the 80+ hours with a young family. It helped to further my career and we saw benefits to our family, like higher pay etc. The wife was very patient with it and it lasted about a year @ 80+ hours. Each year or 2 after that it shortened by 5 to 10 average hours a week. Nowadays I work 40 hours consistently. I learned that my family needed me as much or more than work. I also learned to work smarter and not harder. Finally I learned as Jason and others mentioned that there is more to life than just work. The other thing I realized is that when I was in my mid 20's 80 hour work weeks weren't as bad on my body as a 60 hour work week in my 40's. Over time even in my 20's the 80 hour work week took it's toll.
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September 29, 2010 at 4:06 pm
SQLBill (9/29/2010)
I don't mind working extra hours when needed and my wife supports me in that. It is interesting how lots of companies expect their employees to work extra hours and not get paid for it. I lost one job when the interview went this way:Them: We expect you to work 60- 80 hours weekly.
Me: Will I be paid for the extra time?
Them: No, you will be paid a salary for 40 hours. We require all our IT employees to work those hours.
Me: Are your employees really that bad that they can't do the work in 40 hour weeks?
I know that sometimes there are projects that can't wait until next week. Sometimes we have to put in extra hours without compensation. That's fine. But to be told that it is expected/required on a weekly basis without compensation is just wrong.
-SQLBill
I hate those interviews. I tend to swap companies a lot so interview a lot, so I've gotten a list of questions that I always ask the employer. One of the top 3 is "What's your average employee's work schedule like, including work from home, afterhours?"
Anything over 45 I thank them for their time and move on. I'm fine with the occassional emergency. If every week is an emergency, it's not an emergency, it's a staffing problem.
Never stop learning, even if it hurts. Ego bruises are practically mandatory as you learn unless you've never risked enough to make a mistake.
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