Are the posted questions getting worse?
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Don't point that table at me! You never know when one of those things is loaded!
*click* "This is a 44 ounce pork chop launcher, the most power pork chop launcher in the world. Now, I can't remember if I fired 5 pork chops or 6. So lemme ask ya... Do ya like pork chops? Well... DO YA... PUNK!?" 😛
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
Chris Morris (1/14/2009)
Jeff Moden (1/13/2009)
Steve Jones - Editor (1/13/2009)
And here I was thinking pork chops were pork chops, not developers' heads.Oooohhhh.... I might be in trouble... I've got buckets full of things that look like that. 😛
Have you got a well in your living room and moths flying around?
Heh... you mean a big, deep hole with water in the bottom of it and some little off-white critters flying around it? Is that a problem? 😛
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
Jeff Moden (1/14/2009)
Don't point that table at me! You never know when one of those things is loaded!
*click* "This is a 44 MAGNUM pork chop launcher, the most powerful pork chop launcher in the world. Now, I can't remember if I fired 5 pork chops or 6. So lemme ask ya... Do ya like pork chops? Well... DO YA... PUNK!?" 😛
BOOM
OUCH! Those things hurt!
What a shot! Must have been 450 miles!
Greg E
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Grant Fritchey (1/14/2009)
Well, I just popped offhttp://www.sqlservercentral.com/Forums/Topic635918-149-1.aspx?Update=1
Evidently I'm only providing problems, not solutions.
Like Gail pointed out to this rubber, this isn't the first time he's been a real jerk about receiving free help... why do you guys to continue to answer him? Put him in the "well", cover it up, and let the moths do the work. 😉
Translation: Black Ball the dillweed. Show him the real "jazz"... Totally ignore him on this and all future posts.
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
I'm thinking Gail is going who needs a 44 Magnum, when you have H&H's around.
Maybe you better think about upgrading Jeff. I'd hate for you to bring a knife to a pistol fight, although you may have an edge in accuracy.
I can already feel the next chop about to hit me......I'm sure it will be well frozen as it's already -8F here.
On a different note -
Anyone used Hyper-V yet? and virtualized an SQL server?
Starting to play around, looks like it has possibilities.
Greg E
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Greg Edwards (1/14/2009)
I'm thinking Gail is going who needs a 44 Magnum, when you have H&H's around.Maybe you better think about upgrading Jeff. I'd hate for you to bring a knife to a pistol fight, although you may have an edge in accuracy.
I can already feel the next chop about to hit me......I'm sure it will be well frozen as it's already -8F here.
On a different note -
Anyone used Hyper-V yet? and virtualized an SQL server?
Starting to play around, looks like it has possibilities.
Greg E
We will be using Hpyer-V to virtualize servers where I work, but I have been pretty vocal at the moment to stay away from virtualizing my production SQL servers. I'd rather use multiple instances on the blade servers we are "supposed" to be moving to some time in the future (they have been here for almost a year gathering dust).
I might consider virtualize a couple of test and development servers.
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Greg Edwards (1/14/2009)
I'm thinking Gail is going who needs a 44 Magnum, when you have H&H's around.Maybe you better think about upgrading Jeff. I'd hate for you to bring a knife to a pistol fight, although you may have an edge in accuracy.
I can already feel the next chop about to hit me......I'm sure it will be well frozen as it's already -8F here.
On a different note -
Anyone used Hyper-V yet? and virtualized an SQL server?
Starting to play around, looks like it has possibilities.
Greg E
Actually... I built a "cannon" to fire the potato part of the pork chop dinner. 5 foot barrel with a 5 foot extension (haven't tried the extension, yet), 45.5 millimeter (1.75 inch) muzzle, 2 foot by 0.5 foot combustion chamber, electronic ignition. I can get about 14 seconds of hang time out of a spud... haven't measured for distance yet but if I fire it at a brick wall from 30 feet away, the spud disintegrates leaving only a small potato cone adhering to the wall. I also fired it at the door of an old car at a friend's junk yard... the damage was very impressive. It worked pretty well on the windshield, too! Wouldn't want to get hit by the darned thing, that's for sure. Just for grins, I think I'll get a boneless pork chop, roll it up, and see what happens. I may just have to send Steve a movie of me riding my unicycle and firing it... like I told him, if I can make it recoiless, I'll be able to take the car springs off my butt. 😛
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
Jeff Moden (1/14/2009)
Like Gail pointed out to this rubber, this isn't the first time he's been a real jerk about receiving free help... why do you guys to continue to answer him? Put him in the "well", cover it up, and let the moths do the work. 😉Translation: Black Ball the dillweed. Show him the real "jazz"... Totally ignore him on this and all future posts.
Heh. Oddly enough "Black Ball, The Dillweed" used to be my WoW character name. :P:D:P
[font="Times New Roman"]-- RBarryYoung[/font], [font="Times New Roman"] (302)375-0451[/font] blog: MovingSQL.com, Twitter: @RBarryYoung[font="Arial Black"]
Proactive Performance Solutions, Inc. [/font][font="Verdana"] "Performance is our middle name."[/font] -
LOL!!! Now, that just figures... :hehe:
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
Jeff Moden (1/14/2009)
Actually... I built a "cannon" to fire the potato part of the pork chop dinner. 5 foot barrel with a 5 foot extension (haven't tried the extension, yet), 45.5 millimeter (1.75 inch) muzzle, 2 foot by 0.5 foot combustion chamber, electronic ignition. I can get about 14 seconds of hang time out of a spud... haven't measured for distance yet but if I fire it at a brick wall from 30 feet away, the spud disintegrates leaving only a small potato cone adhering to the wall. I also fired it at the door of an old car at a friend's junk yard... the damage was very impressive. It worked pretty well on the windshield, too! Wouldn't want to get hit by the darned thing, that's for sure. Just for grins, I think I'll get a boneless pork chop, roll it up, and see what happens. I may just have to send Steve a movie of me riding my unicycle and firing it... like I told him, if I can make it recoiless, I'll be able to take the car springs off my butt. 😛Don't bother, Jeff. I found a photo of you with the Recoiless Pork Chop Launcher from your old delivery job:
[font="Times New Roman"]-- RBarryYoung[/font], [font="Times New Roman"] (302)375-0451[/font] blog: MovingSQL.com, Twitter: @RBarryYoung[font="Arial Black"]
Proactive Performance Solutions, Inc. [/font][font="Verdana"] "Performance is our middle name."[/font] -
Heh. "Michigan Pork Chops. They're Mmm, mmm, thwapp!" :D:D:D
[font="Times New Roman"]-- RBarryYoung[/font], [font="Times New Roman"] (302)375-0451[/font] blog: MovingSQL.com, Twitter: @RBarryYoung[font="Arial Black"]
Proactive Performance Solutions, Inc. [/font][font="Verdana"] "Performance is our middle name."[/font] -
RBarryYoung (1/14/2009)
Don't bother, Jeff. I found a photo of you with the Recoiless Pork Chop Launcher from your old delivery job:Heh... man, you don't know how close that is... the lettering on the shirt should be a bright white, though. 😛
--Jeff Moden
RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.
Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally) -
Wow three pages of replies since I went home last night - I must be in the wrong time zone...
On a different note -
Anyone used Hyper-V yet? and virtualized an SQL server?
Starting to play around, looks like it has possibilities.
Greg E
Greg,
We are in the process of moving over to virtualized environments.
My test servers are all on virtual servers.
The organisation is logically split into two. On one side any new requests are going onto to a virtual server, but they only have one sql server so far, so I can't relly report back, as until that second one goes on it's only sort of virtualized! We are running vmware at the moment. We went some seminars about Hyper-V but I don't know if we are planning on going down that route yet.
The other side will also be going virtual but it will be a major project as we have a good dozen or so sql servers and I believe the plan is to move them all in one project. So I'll be having fun with that when it happens...
Going back to the main thread!
I am amazed by the patience of some of you guys in trying to understand the problems that are posted or by putting up with the sarcasm just because the OP has been asked to clarify the problem! I'd have given up by then... And I am a pretty patient person (well most of the time!)
Rodders...
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rodjkidd (1/15/2009)
Wow three pages of replies since I went home last night - I must be in the wrong time zone...Same here.
I am amazed by the patience of some of you guys in trying to understand the problems that are posted or by putting up with the sarcasm just because the OP has been asked to clarify the problem! I'd have given up by then... And I am a pretty patient person (well most of the time!)
After the first few times getting insulted or sarcastic comebacks it becomes more exasperating than anything else (at least for me)
What gets me more these days is not so much the bad questions as the bad (and sometimes dangerous) answers that get posted.
Gail Shaw
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverabilityWe walk in the dark places no others will enter
We stand on the bridge and no one may pass -
Jeff Moden (1/14/2009)
Greg Edwards (1/14/2009)
I'm thinking Gail is going who needs a 44 Magnum, when you have H&H's around.Maybe you better think about upgrading Jeff. I'd hate for you to bring a knife to a pistol fight, although you may have an edge in accuracy.
I can already feel the next chop about to hit me......I'm sure it will be well frozen as it's already -8F here.
On a different note -
Anyone used Hyper-V yet? and virtualized an SQL server?
Starting to play around, looks like it has possibilities.
Greg E
Actually... I built a "cannon" to fire the potato part of the pork chop dinner. 5 foot barrel with a 5 foot extension (haven't tried the extension, yet), 45.5 millimeter (1.75 inch) muzzle, 2 foot by 0.5 foot combustion chamber, electronic ignition. I can get about 14 seconds of hang time out of a spud... haven't measured for distance yet but if I fire it at a brick wall from 30 feet away, the spud disintegrates leaving only a small potato cone adhering to the wall. I also fired it at the door of an old car at a friend's junk yard... the damage was very impressive. It worked pretty well on the windshield, too! Wouldn't want to get hit by the darned thing, that's for sure. Just for grins, I think I'll get a boneless pork chop, roll it up, and see what happens. I may just have to send Steve a movie of me riding my unicycle and firing it... like I told him, if I can make it recoiless, I'll be able to take the car springs off my butt. 😛
See what happens when you leave people up in cold weather for too long. And you thought it was unsafe to go in the rural spots down south. :w00t:
David
@SQLTentmaker“He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose” - Jim Elliot
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