Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Steve Jones - SSC Editor SSC Guru Points: 735912 More actions · Answer 1

I love everyone as sysadmin. Gives me plenty to do if I'm paid by the hour 😉

Steve Jones - SSC Editor SSC Guru Points: 735912 More actions · Answer 2

NoLock for payments is great. Just send me an email and delete my account from your system and I'm fine with whatever you want to do.

Thom A SSC Guru Points: 99127 More actions · Answer 3

Jeff Moden wrote:

Ok... let's all gather hands in a circle around Thom and repeat the DBA prayer with me...

I'm not sure the strength will help me as it's likely to be all remote; only things that would get broken is my own stuff, and I like my stuff. 🙂

Thom~

Excuse my typos and sometimes awful grammar. My fingers work faster than my brain does.
Larnu.uk

Eirikur Eiriksson SSC Guru Points: 182901 More actions · Answer 4

Brandie Tarvin wrote:

Jeff, Tally tables aren't working and this RBAR thing is RIDICULOUS. No one understands you. Try to be more like the other DBAs, please.
@=)

He he he, THIS problem I do know!

😎

If one does not understand the solution, shall one

a. simplify the problem in order to understand the solutions?

b. expand one's knowledge to understand the solution?

c. not be bothered and delegate the problem?

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004250 More actions · Answer 5

Thom A wrote:

Jeff Moden wrote:
Ok... let's all gather hands in a circle around Thom and repeat the DBA prayer with me...
I'm not sure the strength will help me as it's likely to be all remote; only things that would get broken is my own stuff, and I like my stuff. 🙂

Dunno... I particularly like road trips for pork chop dinners. 😀

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Eirikur Eiriksson SSC Guru Points: 182901 More actions · Answer 6

Steve Jones - SSC Editor wrote:

NoLock for payments is great. Just send me an email and delete my account from your system and I'm fine with whatever you want to do.

TODO: Send NOLOCK to MASTERCARD;)

😎

Thom A SSC Guru Points: 99127 More actions · Answer 7

Jeff Moden wrote:

Dunno... I particularly like road trips for pork chop dinners. 😀

If you can supply the catapult I'm sure I can put the pork chops down as an "expense". 🙂

Thom~

Excuse my typos and sometimes awful grammar. My fingers work faster than my brain does.
Larnu.uk

Michael L John One Orange Chip Points: 27053 More actions · Answer 8

Steve Jones - SSC Editor wrote:

I love everyone as sysadmin. Gives me plenty to do if I'm paid by the hour 😉

Not too long ago, I had a client where EVERYONE is the entire active directory was a domain administrator. This was a fairly large organization. who most of us may have done business with.

It took them three years to get things squared away.

Michael L John
If you assassinate a DBA, would you pull a trigger?
To properly post on a forum:
http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/61537/

Brandie Tarvin SSC Guru Points: 173045 More actions · Answer 9

Jeff Moden wrote:

Thom A wrote:
As we're sharing "new job" pains, we're likely going to be are taking responsibility of IT services for our parent company in the month months (years).
Ok... let's all gather hands in a circle around Thom and repeat the DBA prayer with me...
"Dear Lord... Thom is a good DBA stepping into a new unknown. Please grant him patience because, if you grant him strength, he's also going to need bail money". 😀

ROTFLOL. Oh, I so need to make a T-Shirt or sticker out of that one.

Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

Brandie Tarvin SSC Guru Points: 173045 More actions · Answer 10

Sigh. Nope. We should be managing dirty reads on the statement level - not the session level - because apparently there may be some statements in a stored procedure that doesn't want to use dirty reads. (I just asked.)

And while I was looking up NOLOCK vs READ UNCOMMITTED, I found an April Fool's prank telling people it was depreciated for SQL 2022. Which it doesn't mention until the end of the post. But this came up in the top 10 results and I shudder to think how many people don't read past the first headlines and freak out, taking it seriously.

Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004250 More actions · Answer 11

Brandie Tarvin wrote:

Jeff Moden wrote:
Thom A wrote:
As we're sharing "new job" pains, we're likely going to be are taking responsibility of IT services for our parent company in the month months (years).
Ok... let's all gather hands in a circle around Thom and repeat the DBA prayer with me...
"Dear Lord... Thom is a good DBA stepping into a new unknown. Please grant him patience because, if you grant him strength, he's also going to need bail money". 😀
ROTFLOL. Oh, I so need to make a T-Shirt or sticker out of that one.

It's actually a very old saying that I just tweaked a bit for the occasion. First time I heard it was back in the late '50s when my Mom said it.

https://duckduckgo.com/?q=if+you+grant+me+strenth+bail+money&t=newext&atb=v278-1&iax=images&ia=images

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Steve Collins SSCrazy Points: 2141 More actions · Answer 12

Author Joe Booth gives SSC a nice mention in this YouTube video at about the 11:11 mark. The channel is Syncfusion which afaik is a .NET UI kit vendor (which we ended up not using but I'm still subscribed to the YT channel). Usually the "front of the front end" vendors avoid talking about the database so this was a pleasant surprise

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pH0UIQNvbwc&t=10s

Aus dem Paradies, das Cantor uns geschaffen, soll uns niemand vertreiben können

WayneS SSC Guru Points: 95450 More actions · Answer 13

Michael L John wrote:

jonathan.crawford wrote:
Trying to imagine a scenario where I worked with Jeff Moden and tried to call out his code...
That would make a very viral video!!!!!!!!!

I know it's been a couple of weeks since this was posted, but I just had to say...

Pork Chop Launcher in action!

Wayne
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server 2008
Author - SQL Server T-SQL Recipes

If you can't explain to another person how the code that you're copying from the internet works, then DON'T USE IT on a production system! After all, you will be the one supporting it!

Links:
For better assistance in answering your questions
Performance Problems
Common date/time routines
Understanding and Using APPLY Part 1 & Part 2

WayneS SSC Guru Points: 95450 More actions · Answer 14

Brandie Tarvin wrote:

There's a push to use NOLOCK on everything unless the users absolutely cannot deal with dirty reads because "it improves performance." ACK!

Sounds like it's time to teach them about RCSI.

Wayne
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server 2008
Author - SQL Server T-SQL Recipes

If you can't explain to another person how the code that you're copying from the internet works, then DON'T USE IT on a production system! After all, you will be the one supporting it!

Links:
For better assistance in answering your questions
Performance Problems
Common date/time routines
Understanding and Using APPLY Part 1 & Part 2

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004250 More actions · Answer 15

WayneS wrote:

Michael L John wrote:
jonathan.crawford wrote:
Trying to imagine a scenario where I worked with Jeff Moden and tried to call out his code...
That would make a very viral video!!!!!!!!!
I know it's been a couple of weeks since this was posted, but I just had to say...
Pork Chop Launcher in action!

Heh... speaking of pork chops... here's Vincent Price's take on them.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amICZ1aVaCg

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)