Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Chris Harshman SSC-Forever Points: 42192 More actions · Answer 1

JustMarie - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 10:35 AM
At this point I'd like to see the OS/2 Warp cat just chasing a 'Done!' around the screen and catching it when it's really done. Give up on time estimates all together and make it something entertaining to watch.
I miss that cat...

I worked at a company a number of years ago, where the users complained that certain reporting pages of the intranet website were taking too long to load. The web developer decided the best way to deal with it was to display a GIF of a cartoon frog that was dancing an playing the banjo. We never heard another complaint about the report pages taking too long.

Thom A SSC Guru Points: 99130 More actions · Answer 2

Chris Harshman - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 12:28 PM
Thom A - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 8:26 AM
Lies:
Symantec??? OK, there's your problem right there! Actually we just moved off of Symantec 2 months ago, and it took like 2 hours and 2 reboots to remove it from my computer :crazy:

Company's choice of antivirus, not mine. 😉 It's been really playing on my PC the last few days. Disabled itself, wouldn't start up, won't get updates from the Host, using 80% of my CPU. Supports answer was to uninstall it and install it again.

I use ClamAV at home. Strange how command line has come back after all these years. 🙂

Thom~

Excuse my typos and sometimes awful grammar. My fingers work faster than my brain does.
Larnu.uk

Steve Jones - SSC Editor SSC Guru Points: 736183 More actions · Answer 3

jonathan.crawford - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 8:44 AM
Steve Jones - SSC Editor - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:30 AM
Grant Fritchey - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:23 AM
Steve Jones - SSC Editor - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:15 AM
It didn't change the weather forecast for CO, either. Still now snow. Try something else.
Yeah, but did you try the clustered columnstore index?
I need to. Dry and warm here. It's @#$%#$%@# December.
I don't remember that one from the official Apollo mission archive. What are you standing on?

Auger, it's spinning and trying to drill into the Colorado clay.

Lynn Pettis SSC Guru Points: 442467 More actions · Answer 4

Okay, let's implement our own interface over ODBC using cursors instead of using something that has already been built and enhanced. Wait, sort of sounds what my company does with some technologies, let's write and maintain our own X technology instead of using something commercial that has been developed and supported by a company dedicated to that technology.

Lynn Pettis SSC Guru Points: 442467 More actions · Answer 5

And isn't fun when people ask for help but can't show you anything?

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004329 More actions · Answer 6

Steve Jones - SSC Editor - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 12:59 PM
jonathan.crawford - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 8:44 AM
Steve Jones - SSC Editor - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:30 AM
Grant Fritchey - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:23 AM
Steve Jones - SSC Editor - Friday, December 1, 2017 11:15 AM
It didn't change the weather forecast for CO, either. Still now snow. Try something else.
Yeah, but did you try the clustered columnstore index?
I need to. Dry and warm here. It's @#$%#$%@# December.
I don't remember that one from the official Apollo mission archive. What are you standing on?
Auger, it's spinning and trying to drill into the Colorado clay.

Heh... Sounds like a "boring" job. 😉

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004329 More actions · Answer 7

Chris Harshman - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 12:33 PM
JustMarie - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 10:35 AM
At this point I'd like to see the OS/2 Warp cat just chasing a 'Done!' around the screen and catching it when it's really done. Give up on time estimates all together and make it something entertaining to watch.
I miss that cat...
I worked at a company a number of years ago, where the users complained that certain reporting pages of the intranet website were taking too long to load. The web developer decided the best way to deal with it was to display a GIF of a cartoon frog that was dancing an playing the banjo. We never heard another complaint about the report pages taking too long.

That's known (quite literally, in this case) as "stringing someone along". 😉 User perception is a wonderful thing but fast code is better reality.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004329 More actions · Answer 8

Thom A - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 12:54 PM
Chris Harshman - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 12:28 PM
Thom A - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 8:26 AM
Lies:
Symantec??? OK, there's your problem right there! Actually we just moved off of Symantec 2 months ago, and it took like 2 hours and 2 reboots to remove it from my computer :crazy:
Company's choice of antivirus, not mine. 😉 It's been really playing on my PC the last few days. Disabled itself, wouldn't start up, won't get updates from the Host, using 80% of my CPU. Supports answer was to uninstall it and install it again.
I use ClamAV at home. Strange how command line has come back after all these years. 🙂

We've not had such problems with Symantec EndPoint. We had one problem years ago where it went wonky after an upgrade and we had to do a rollback but it's been pretty well behaved for us.

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Thomas Rushton SSC-Insane Points: 22649 More actions · Answer 9

jonathan.crawford - Tuesday, December 5, 2017 8:42 AM
<email>
Dear Beloved Colleague,
Per our recent conversation of DMM/DD/YYYY, I will be taking the following actions, providing this email to make sure that the tasks are not lost in the busy shuffle here at ABC corp. This also serves as a reminder that you promised to X, Y and Z by MM/DD/YYYY. Thank you for your insight, it is truly appreciated, and I believe that working together to solve this problem will make not just our lives better, but the entire company more productive.
Sincerely,
Grumpy Elf
</email><read receipt></read receipt>

Dear Grumpy Elf

Please please please sort your date formats out.

Sincerely,
Pissed-off European colleague

Thomas Rushton
blog: https://thelonedba.wordpress.com

Thom A SSC Guru Points: 99130 More actions · Answer 10

OH GOOD, this again... (installing this time):

Been at 12 seconds for 15 minutes... /sigh. Think it's time to ask for a new PC.

Thom~

Excuse my typos and sometimes awful grammar. My fingers work faster than my brain does.
Larnu.uk

Jo Pattyn SSC-Dedicated Points: 32345 More actions · Answer 11

Jo Pattyn

SSC-Dedicated

Points: 32345

December 6, 2017 at 5:38 am

#1970903

Time for a coffee break.

Thom A SSC Guru Points: 99130 More actions · Answer 12

Jo Pattyn - Wednesday, December 6, 2017 5:38 AM
Time for a coffee break.

Not sure the boss would appreciate me taking a 1 hour 45 minutes coffee break. On the plus side, 12 seconds to go. 😉

Thom~

Excuse my typos and sometimes awful grammar. My fingers work faster than my brain does.
Larnu.uk

DesNorton SSC-Insane Points: 24386 More actions · Answer 13

Thom A - Wednesday, December 6, 2017 5:55 AM
Jo Pattyn - Wednesday, December 6, 2017 5:38 AM
Time for a coffee break.
Not sure the boss would appreciate me taking a 1 hour 45 minutes coffee break. On the plus side, 12 seconds to go. 😉

Actually ... It's a 12 sec coffee break

How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help.

jasona.work SSC Guru Points: 50117 More actions · Answer 14

Next year for the holidays, I want the same lawn ornament as my work has out front:
Linky linky

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 15

jasona.work - Wednesday, December 6, 2017 8:12 AM
Next year for the holidays, I want the same lawn ornament as my work has out front:
Linky linky

That is awesome!!!

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Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/