Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Are the posted questions getting worse?

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The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 1

I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.

Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

Gail Shaw SSC Guru Points: 1004504 More actions · Answer 2

Gazareth (9/9/2016)
What I've learnt from that thread:
1. Gail's desktop is faster than mine.

Considering how much money I've thrown at that machine in the last 12 months, not overly surprised.

Seriously, it's a beast. Beats several clients' production servers for specs, I can have a heavy SQL test running and still play a game at full graphics settings

Gail Shaw
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverability

We walk in the dark places no others will enter
We stand on the bridge and no one may pass

J Livingston SQL SSC Guru Points: 51550 More actions · Answer 3

Gazareth (9/9/2016)

drew.allen (9/9/2016)
Jacob Wilkins (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
Okay.... although I'm not going back into the divide by zero thread.
Both SET ANSI_WARNINGS OFF and SET ARITHABORT OFF will give him the behavior he wants.
Anyone who cares can give him that information and let him live with the consequences
https://msdn.microsoft.com/en-us/library/ms190368.aspx
https://msdn.microsoft.com/en-us/library/ms190306.aspx%5B/quote%5D
Yeah, I thought about mentioning that he could set both of those to off and get the desired result for divide by zero, but they have so many other consequences that I figured I'd stick with offering NULLIF like you and some of the other posters.
Still weird that he was so confident the scalar UDF performed at least as well as NULLIF; there's no way he ever tested it, so whence the confidence?
The world's a funny place sometimes...
And he thinks that he didn't use TSQL to write his function. I'm wondering what language he thinks that is, but I don't really want to get involved in that thread.
Drew
What I've learnt from that thread:
1. Gail's desktop is faster than mine.

feeling pleased (for the minute!)

off the shelf tower.....

6th Generation Intel(R) Core(TM) i7-6700 Processor (8M Cache, up to 4.0 GHz)

16GB (2x8GB) 2133MHz DDR4 Non-ECC 1 SR

2TB 7200 rpm Hard Drive + 32GB M.2 SSD Cache

Microsoft SQL Server 2016 Developer Edition (64-bit) on Windows 10 Home 6.3 <X64> (Build 14393: )

Table 'SomeTable'. Scan count 1, logical reads 210085, physical reads 0, read-ahead reads 0, lob logical reads 0, lob physical reads 0, lob read-ahead reads 0.

SQL Server Execution Times:

CPU time = 19640 ms, elapsed time = 19711 ms.

(100000000 row(s) affected)

________________________________________________________________
you can lead a user to data....but you cannot make them think
and remember....every day is a school day

The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 4

I can have a heavy SQL test running and still play a game at full graphics settings

So can I !!

Of course, I'm still playing Zork.... :unsure:

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 5

The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.

That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB

I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:

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Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 6

The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I can have a heavy SQL test running and still play a game at full graphics settings
So can I !!
Of course, I'm still playing Zork.... :unsure:

Just a few more weeks and you should finally solve it. 😛

_______________________________________________________________

Need help? Help us help you.

Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

Luis Cazares SSC Guru Points: 183706 More actions · Answer 7

Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:

I think I found how I want to die. :hehe:

Luis C.
General Disclaimer:
Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2

The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 8

I would still be chewing as they applied the paddles and yelled "CLEAR!"

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

The Dixie Flatline SSC Guru Points: 53354 More actions · Answer 9

Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I can have a heavy SQL test running and still play a game at full graphics settings
So can I !!
Of course, I'm still playing Zork.... :unsure:
Just a few more weeks and you should finally solve it. 😛

I hope so, but I've heard there is a Zork II :w00t: !!

Edited to move exclamations points because they look too much like capital I's

__________________________________________________

Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 10

The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I can have a heavy SQL test running and still play a game at full graphics settings
So can I !!
Of course, I'm still playing Zork.... :unsure:
Just a few more weeks and you should finally solve it. 😛
I hope so, but I've heard there is a Zork II :w00t: !!
Edited to move exclamations points because they look too much like capital I's

And my favorite one from the series, Planetfall.

_______________________________________________________________

Need help? Help us help you.

Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

Greg Edwards-268690 SSC-Insane Points: 20680 More actions · Answer 11

Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:

What timing. Fishing with the guys all this week, and it's usually a couple pounds of bacon per day.

I am more than ready to get on the road.

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004365 More actions · Answer 12

Luis Cazares (9/9/2016)
Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:
I think I found how I want to die. :hehe:

GAAAAHHHH!!!!! I shouldn't have looked! Now I'm so hungry that my stomach thinks my throat has been cut. 😛 MAN! Those sandwiches that the shakes look awesome! I wonder if they'd deliver to Troy, Michigan for lunch. :w00t:

--Jeff Moden

RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.

Helpful Links:
How to post code problems
How to Post Performance Problems
Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

Ed Wagner SSC Guru Points: 287026 More actions · Answer 13

Jeff Moden (9/9/2016)
Luis Cazares (9/9/2016)
Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:
I think I found how I want to die. :hehe:
GAAAAHHHH!!!!! I shouldn't have looked! Now I'm so hungry that my stomach thinks my throat has been cut. 😛 MAN! Those sandwiches that the shakes look awesome! I wonder if they'd deliver to Troy, Michigan for lunch. :w00t:

That looks like the BLT at Tony's in Birch Run, MI. Their sandwiches are huge and come with no less than 1 pound of bacon. Sorry, Jeff, but they don't deliver.

Tally Tables - Performance Personified
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Best practices on how to ask questions

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 14

Jeff Moden (9/9/2016)
Luis Cazares (9/9/2016)
Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:
I think I found how I want to die. :hehe:
GAAAAHHHH!!!!! I shouldn't have looked! Now I'm so hungry that my stomach thinks my throat has been cut. 😛 MAN! Those sandwiches that the shakes look awesome! I wonder if they'd deliver to Troy, Michigan for lunch. :w00t:

The shakes are insane to say the least. They have a bunch of flavors and even though it isn't on the menu you can have them mix them half/half. My inlaws live in St. Louis and I first found this place on Man vs. Food and had to go there to experience that sandwich. It was worth the trip.

_______________________________________________________________

Need help? Help us help you.

Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 15

Ed Wagner (9/9/2016)
Jeff Moden (9/9/2016)
Luis Cazares (9/9/2016)
Sean Lange (9/9/2016)
The Dixie Flatline (9/9/2016)
I have been making bacon like that for years...never knew it had a name. Another great way is to put a liberal amount of brown sugar on top of the raw bacon and bake them on a sheet pan. Super sticky but holy cow is it tasty.
Yeah we bake it on a sheet pan too. You should try the Pecan-Rosemary. You'll never look at a BLT sandwich the same way again.
That does sound good. Of course it will challenging fro any BLT to rival the behemoth found at Crown Candy in St. Louis. It is only $9 but man is it under priced. Check out some pics of it....https://www.google.com/search?q=crown+candy+blt&biw=1920&bih=914&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwie_4bL9ILPAhUIJ5oKHSr9AvIQ_AUICCgB
I can only imagine if it had the pecan-rosemary bacon on it. :w00t::w00t::w00t:
I think I found how I want to die. :hehe:
GAAAAHHHH!!!!! I shouldn't have looked! Now I'm so hungry that my stomach thinks my throat has been cut. 😛 MAN! Those sandwiches that the shakes look awesome! I wonder if they'd deliver to Troy, Michigan for lunch. :w00t:
That looks like the BLT at Tony's in Birch Run, MI. Their sandwiches are huge and come with no less than 1 pound of bacon. Sorry, Jeff, but they don't deliver.

Ohhh I have to try this place. I found their BLT on the online menu....it is the first item listed on the "lighter side" page. ROFL!!!!!

http://www.tonysi75restaurant.com/sandwiches-bull-lighter-side.html

_______________________________________________________________

Need help? Help us help you.

Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/