Are the posted questions getting worse?

  • TomThomson (2/19/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Hugo Kornelis (2/19/2016)


    Jeff Moden (2/19/2016)


    In that same vein, I also won't work for a company that requires you to pass an "intelligence test" or "personality test". They should automatically know that I'm an idiot from the drool coming out of my mouth and that I'd fail their personality test from the blood on my shirt. 😛

    Oh. I thought those blood stains were just the result of shaving before coffee.

    With Jeff's beard, I wonder what he shaves. I'd better not use my imagination.

    Y U say "what" when you mean "whom" ? :laugh:

    I advise you not to assume that shave is a reflexive verb. 😛

    If Jeff resorts to shaving when his launcher runs out of chops, let the shavee beware!

    I wasn't thinking of shave as a reflexive verb. But, somehow, "what" seems less frightening than "whom", although, not really enjoyable either. :hehe:

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    TomThomson (2/19/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Hugo Kornelis (2/19/2016)


    Jeff Moden (2/19/2016)


    In that same vein, I also won't work for a company that requires you to pass an "intelligence test" or "personality test". They should automatically know that I'm an idiot from the drool coming out of my mouth and that I'd fail their personality test from the blood on my shirt. 😛

    Oh. I thought those blood stains were just the result of shaving before coffee.

    With Jeff's beard, I wonder what he shaves. I'd better not use my imagination.

    Y U say "what" when you mean "whom" ? :laugh:

    I advise you not to assume that shave is a reflexive verb. 😛

    If Jeff resorts to shaving when his launcher runs out of chops, let the shavee beware!

    I wasn't thinking of shave as a reflexive verb. But, somehow, "what" seems less frightening than "whom", although, not really enjoyable either. :hehe:

    Ummm, I think the what can be far more frightening. What on whom is an entirely different array of fright.

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

  • SQLRNNR (2/19/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    TomThomson (2/19/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Hugo Kornelis (2/19/2016)


    Jeff Moden (2/19/2016)


    In that same vein, I also won't work for a company that requires you to pass an "intelligence test" or "personality test". They should automatically know that I'm an idiot from the drool coming out of my mouth and that I'd fail their personality test from the blood on my shirt. 😛

    Oh. I thought those blood stains were just the result of shaving before coffee.

    With Jeff's beard, I wonder what he shaves. I'd better not use my imagination.

    Y U say "what" when you mean "whom" ? :laugh:

    I advise you not to assume that shave is a reflexive verb. 😛

    If Jeff resorts to shaving when his launcher runs out of chops, let the shavee beware!

    I wasn't thinking of shave as a reflexive verb. But, somehow, "what" seems less frightening than "whom", although, not really enjoyable either. :hehe:

    Ummm, I think the what can be far more frightening. What on whom is an entirely different array of fright.

    Full moons are kind of tough. 😛

    By the way, I found someone that has beaten even my 4 banded pork chop launcher.

    https://weather.com/series/great-outdoors/video/woman-thrown-by-human-slingshot-in-provo-utah

    --Jeff Moden


    RBAR is pronounced "ree-bar" and is a "Modenism" for Row-By-Agonizing-Row.
    First step towards the paradigm shift of writing Set Based code:
    ________Stop thinking about what you want to do to a ROW... think, instead, of what you want to do to a COLUMN.

    Change is inevitable... Change for the better is not.


    Helpful Links:
    How to post code problems
    How to Post Performance Problems
    Create a Tally Function (fnTally)

  • GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

  • Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • Anyone here have / had some experience with the Surface Pro 4? If so what are your thoughts on it?

  • Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Mickey C Mouse, right?

  • Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Exactly my point. So why would someone lie when it's so quickly and easily looked up and shot down? I guess if they're copying resume's then their employment won't last long anyway, but why not just try to get a job honestly?

    Edit: I guess I must be old-fashioned, but I would never want a dishonest DBA.

  • djj (2/22/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Mickey C Mouse, right?

    No, Mickey Mouse is the one who's going to vote 15,000 times in the next election. 😛

  • Ed Wagner (2/22/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Exactly my point. So why would someone lie when it's so quickly and easily looked up and shot down? I guess if they're copying resume's then their employment won't last long anyway, but why not just try to get a job honestly?

    Edit: I guess I must be old-fashioned, but I would never want a dishonest DBA.

    Because honesty does not get you interviews. :hehe:

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • djj (2/22/2016)


    Luis Cazares (2/19/2016)


    Ed Wagner (2/19/2016)


    GilaMonster (2/19/2016)


    SQLRNNR (2/18/2016)


    I am seeing people claim to be an MCM for some of these interviews. I know full well they aren't an MCM. I have also been hearing that there is a whole horde (more than 20) of MCMs living in my region.

    I keep hearing about someone else in Johannesburg claiming (to a couple of my clients) to be an MCM for SQL Server. I can't get a name and they're never substantiated (just "oh, we had someone offering DB services the other week who's also an MCM").

    I'm the only SQL MCM on the continent!

    I've heard of people filling resumes with lies before, but to say they're an MCM when they're not kind of defies logic.

    They're probably just copying other people resumés without actually knowing what MCM stands for or that it can be tracked very easily. There used to be a site, that has been reduced to a pdf, since it won't change: http://download.microsoft.com/download/7/c/2/7c28964b-e49d-4c4d-a78b-fc0c844fa66b/mcm-sql.pdf

    Mickey C Mouse, right?

    No, it's Modern Creation Munich, so it means that you're part of a luxury brand.

    Luis C.
    General Disclaimer:
    Are you seriously taking the advice and code from someone from the internet without testing it? Do you at least understand it? Or can it easily kill your server?

    How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help: Option 1 / Option 2
  • Thanks to Steve (and those who agreed with him) on the book suggestion Ready Player One, I took it to Canyons-Park City and read it on the plane and during our mountain down times. It was a great read and I found it hard to put down. Soooo, now I'm looking for the next book suggestion.... anyone?

  • Like Fantasy and crime/detective stories?

    If so, Rivers of London (also published under the name "Midnight Riot" in the US).

    Gail Shaw
    Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
    SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverability

    We walk in the dark places no others will enter
    We stand on the bridge and no one may pass
  • If you like SF, "Redshirts" by John Scalzi

    For a bit more militaristic bent of SF, John Ringos' series: "Live Free or Die," "Citadel," and "The Hot Gate" (The "Troy Rising" trilogy.) IIRC, he wrote the series as sort of a precursor to the web comic "Schlock Mercenary"

  • BL0B_EATER (2/22/2016)


    Anyone here have / had some experience with the Surface Pro 4? If so what are your thoughts on it?

    My wife has one as her work laptop now. She got it a few weeks ago. So far it seems to be pretty spectacular. The only real challenge is that some applications have a graphic issue with dual screen. Things like Skype for business have some strange display issues. They either are super huge on the external monitor or nearly microscopic on the surface screen. Outlook has a similar problem but not as pronounced. According to MS this is a known issue with no resolution currently.

    _______________________________________________________________

    Need help? Help us help you.

    Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

    Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

    Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
    Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
    Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
    Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

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