Are the posted questions getting worse?

  • jasona.work (6/3/2014)


    You know, I'd not really thought about this until now, but...

    How do people find all these "undocumented" options for various SQL commands?

    dbcc autopilot???

    create index... WITH STATISTICS_ONLY = ???

    What do these people have, an inside source at MS or something? A decompiler so they can pull apart the SQL Server executables and DLLs?

    Just curious...

    Wait, why am I hearing helicopters all of a sudden?

    And why are the helicopters I see all black, with no log*(yhijh)&(*Y)(*Ypinlk

    /SESSION TERMINATED AT SOURCE

    There is a splinter group of the Illuminati that gathers and trade SQL Server secrets.

    You have to know the secret handshake to get in...

    Need an answer? No, you need a question
    My blog at https://sqlkover.com.
    MCSE Business Intelligence - Microsoft Data Platform MVP

  • Koen Verbeeck (6/3/2014)


    jasona.work (6/3/2014)


    You know, I'd not really thought about this until now, but...

    How do people find all these "undocumented" options for various SQL commands?

    dbcc autopilot???

    create index... WITH STATISTICS_ONLY = ???

    What do these people have, an inside source at MS or something? A decompiler so they can pull apart the SQL Server executables and DLLs?

    Just curious...

    Wait, why am I hearing helicopters all of a sudden?

    And why are the helicopters I see all black, with no log*(yhijh)&(*Y)(*Ypinlk

    /SESSION TERMINATED AT SOURCE

    There is a splinter group of the Illuminati that gathers and trade SQL Server secrets.

    You have to know the secret handshake to get in...

    Is that the group that meets on Plum Island? I'd like to attend one of those some time, but I don't have the password or the handshake.

  • Ed Wagner (6/3/2014)


    Koen Verbeeck (6/3/2014)


    jasona.work (6/3/2014)


    You know, I'd not really thought about this until now, but...

    How do people find all these "undocumented" options for various SQL commands?

    dbcc autopilot???

    create index... WITH STATISTICS_ONLY = ???

    What do these people have, an inside source at MS or something? A decompiler so they can pull apart the SQL Server executables and DLLs?

    Just curious...

    Wait, why am I hearing helicopters all of a sudden?

    And why are the helicopters I see all black, with no log*(yhijh)&(*Y)(*Ypinlk

    /SESSION TERMINATED AT SOURCE

    There is a splinter group of the Illuminati that gathers and trade SQL Server secrets.

    You have to know the secret handshake to get in...

    Is that the group that meets on Plum Island? I'd like to attend one of those some time, but I don't have the password or the handshake.

    Who said a thing about a password? How do you know that? You're not supposed to! Speak!

    ps: it is the nickname for the 63rd parameter of DBCC Timewarp

    Need an answer? No, you need a question
    My blog at https://sqlkover.com.
    MCSE Business Intelligence - Microsoft Data Platform MVP

  • jasona.work (6/3/2014)


    You know, I'd not really thought about this until now, but...

    How do people find all these "undocumented" options for various SQL commands?

    Management Studio, definitions of system procedures/functions. Debugger with the public symbols. Persuading someone who knows to say.

    Gail Shaw
    Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
    SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverability

    We walk in the dark places no others will enter
    We stand on the bridge and no one may pass
  • Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    "The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
    - Theodore Roosevelt

    Author of:
    SQL Server Execution Plans
    SQL Server Query Performance Tuning

  • Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    I couldn't be nice. Sorry. There was no reason to be nice to that person at all.

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

  • SQLRNNR (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    I couldn't be nice. Sorry. There was no reason to be nice to that person at all.

    Nah, you weren't mean. Just pointing out the obvious.

    "The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
    - Theodore Roosevelt

    Author of:
    SQL Server Execution Plans
    SQL Server Query Performance Tuning

  • Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    Couldn't pile on anyway, I don't even have SQL Server 2014 to play with out here in Colorful Afghanistan.

  • Lynn Pettis (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    Couldn't pile on anyway, I don't even have SQL Server 2014 to play with out here in Colorful Afghanistan.

    $60 for a dev copy 😉

    Just install it on your laptop:hehe:

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

  • Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    SQLRNNR (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    I couldn't be nice. Sorry. There was no reason to be nice to that person at all.

    Nah, you weren't mean. Just pointing out the obvious.

    Oops forgot the sarcastic smile 😉

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

  • Looks like SSC might have a PHP compromise.

    Various pages try to download a junk php file to my machine now. It started just yesterday.

    Who do we contact about that?

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

  • SQLRNNR (6/5/2014)


    Lynn Pettis (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    Couldn't pile on anyway, I don't even have SQL Server 2014 to play with out here in Colorful Afghanistan.

    $60 for a dev copy 😉

    Just install it on your laptop:hehe:

    Oh, I could buy and have it shipped out here, just not sure if I want to at the moment. I could have it shipped to my ex and pick it up while home for Christmas.

    And down load it? Not going to try on our 4MB pipe out here.

  • Message deleted - how this website converts "backspace" into "send" is beyond me, and I didn't mean to send this as it was much too mild. A less mild version follows.

    Tom

  • SQLRNNR (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    I couldn't be nice. Sorry. There was no reason to be nice to that person at all.

    Bollocks Jason. Your were too nice. That sort of drivel needs dealing with properly, with no sugaring, otherwise the offener will not learn.

    Tom

  • TomThomson (6/5/2014)


    SQLRNNR (6/5/2014)


    Grant Fritchey (6/5/2014)


    Please, please, please, bestester behavior, no piling on of any kind (or I'll delete the posts and I can do that, BWA-HA-HA-HA, THE POWER!, ahem, where was I), but I just had my first "In-memory sucks because I can't violate the laws of spacetime with it and it doesn't perform miracles" post. I thought I'd share. I'm positive it's just the first of hundreds, if not thousands, of these.

    And I reiterate, be nice. I think I've already been overly churlish, so we don't need anyone adding to it.

    I couldn't be nice. Sorry. There was no reason to be nice to that person at all.

    Bollocks Jason. Your were too nice. That sort of drivel needs dealing with properly, with no sugaring, otherwise the offender will not learn.

    Fair point 😀

    Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
    _______________________________________________
    I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
    SQL RNNR
    Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
    Learn Extended Events

Viewing 15 posts - 44,086 through 44,100 (of 66,712 total)

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Login to reply