Are the posted questions getting worse?

  • dwain.c (6/12/2013)


    I can only imagine what it must be like to have SQL Server running in some non-English language. MS probably translated the obtuse into the indecipherable.

    Error: 1899-12-32 02:05:13.82

    Code: 0xPE13ACK552

    Source: Execute SQL Task

    Description: Returned command no information on column particles.

    Error looked for this is not.

    End Error

    Error: 1900-00-01 02:05:13.82

    Code: 0xPE13ACK552

    Source: Execute SQL Task SSIS.Communications

    Description: "item "DBCC Timewarp " (86) " parameterized offspring mapped to invalid

    terabyte. Memory space splooshed. "VS_NEEDSBRAINBLEACH".

    End Error

    Information: <Datetime coordinates invalid>

    Description: Thank you for using SSIS. Come back again with pepperoni.

    End Information

    Information: End of Time Warp Cascade Event

    ..And gum. We like gum.

    End Information

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

  • Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

  • jasona.work (6/13/2013)


    Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

    I had to build a data scrub the other day for a database we're bringing down from production to our Dev/Test environments. I peppered it with science fiction references because I couldn't be bothered to be more creative. By the time I was finished writing it, I was cackling with mad glee and wondering if any of our testers would get the jokes.

    There's been no testing yet, so I haven't heard anything yet. But I'm counting down the days... @=)

    EDIT: Mr. Skroob's account password is 1234. +100 to anyone who gets the reference.

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

  • Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    jasona.work (6/13/2013)


    Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

    I had to build a data scrub the other day for a database we're bringing down from production to our Dev/Test environments. I peppered it with science fiction references because I couldn't be bothered to be more creative. By the time I was finished writing it, I was cackling with mad glee and wondering if any of our testers would get the jokes.

    There's been no testing yet, so I haven't heard anything yet. But I'm counting down the days... @=)

    EDIT: Mr. Skroob's account password is 1234. +100 to anyone who gets the reference.

    Oooh, oooh, Mr. Kot-tair! (a bonus +100 for getting that reference) -

    A) The password actually is 12345.

    B) That's King Roland's password, not President Skroob's password.

    C) "That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life! That's the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!"

    Jason Wolfkill

  • wolfkillj (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    jasona.work (6/13/2013)


    Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

    I had to build a data scrub the other day for a database we're bringing down from production to our Dev/Test environments. I peppered it with science fiction references because I couldn't be bothered to be more creative. By the time I was finished writing it, I was cackling with mad glee and wondering if any of our testers would get the jokes.

    There's been no testing yet, so I haven't heard anything yet. But I'm counting down the days... @=)

    EDIT: Mr. Skroob's account password is 1234. +100 to anyone who gets the reference.

    Oooh, oooh, Mr. Kot-tair! (a bonus +100 for getting that reference) -

    A) The password actually is 12345.

    B) That's King Roland's password, not President Skroob's password.

    C) "That's the stupidest combination I've ever heard in my life! That's the kind of thing an idiot would have on his luggage!"

    1) You're right. I missed a digit.

    2) Skroob actually admits that is indeed the combination on his luggage.

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

  • +1000 to anyone who gets this reference.

    The Curator's bills are sent to Amelia Williams.

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

  • Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    __________________________________________________

    Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
    Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

  • The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    Brandie Tarvin, MCITP Database AdministratorLiveJournal Blog: http://brandietarvin.livejournal.com/[/url]On LinkedIn!, Google+, and Twitter.Freelance Writer: ShadowrunLatchkeys: Nevermore, Latchkeys: The Bootleg War, and Latchkeys: Roscoes in the Night are now available on Nook and Kindle.

  • Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    jasona.work (6/13/2013)


    Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

    I had to build a data scrub the other day for a database we're bringing down from production to our Dev/Test environments. I peppered it with science fiction references because I couldn't be bothered to be more creative. By the time I was finished writing it, I was cackling with mad glee and wondering if any of our testers would get the jokes.

    There's been no testing yet, so I haven't heard anything yet. But I'm counting down the days... @=)

    EDIT: Mr. Skroob's account password is 1234. +100 to anyone who gets the reference.

    Was there a Products table? If so, I hope it had a row for Spaceballs - The Flame Thrower!

  • Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    ACK!

    I posted the wrong cartoon.

    Take a stab at this one, Brandie.

    http://xkcd.com/1221/[/url]

    __________________________________________________

    Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
    Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

  • The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    ACK!

    I posted the wrong cartoon.

    Take a stab at this one, Brandie.

    http://xkcd.com/1221/[/url]

    Seems to be a Dr. Who reference, as whenever the Doctor's companion is asked about him they just say "He's just the Doctor".

  • The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    ACK!

    I posted the wrong cartoon.

    Take a stab at this one, Brandie.

    http://xkcd.com/1221/[/url]

    Dr Who?

  • Steve Jones - SSC Editor (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    ACK!

    I posted the wrong cartoon.

    Take a stab at this one, Brandie.

    http://xkcd.com/1221/[/url]

    Dr Who?

    I don't know...oh wait, he is on third.

    _______________________________________________________________

    Need help? Help us help you.

    Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

    Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

    Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
    Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
    Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
    Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

  • Steve Thompson-454462 (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    jasona.work (6/13/2013)


    Why can I picture something like that actually being buried in the depths of the SQL / SSIS code?

    One of those little "bored programmer" things that's hidden in a comment somewhere...

    I had to build a data scrub the other day for a database we're bringing down from production to our Dev/Test environments. I peppered it with science fiction references because I couldn't be bothered to be more creative. By the time I was finished writing it, I was cackling with mad glee and wondering if any of our testers would get the jokes.

    There's been no testing yet, so I haven't heard anything yet. But I'm counting down the days... @=)

    EDIT: Mr. Skroob's account password is 1234. +100 to anyone who gets the reference.

    Was there a Products table? If so, I hope it had a row for Spaceballs - The Flame Thrower!

    The kids love it!

    😀

  • Sean Lange (6/13/2013)


    Steve Jones - SSC Editor (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Brandie Tarvin (6/13/2013)


    The Dixie Flatline (6/13/2013)


    Don't talk to me about time. Time is my business.

    Dixie, I could kiss you for this. @=)

    By the way, does anybody else get this cartoon? Or do you have to be just the right age and just the right shade of geeky?

    http://xkcd.com/1222/

    Actually, I do get it. The final panel is him doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying, keeping silent, because he never does talk about those things, and obsessing.

    ACK!

    I posted the wrong cartoon.

    Take a stab at this one, Brandie.

    http://xkcd.com/1221/[/url]

    Dr Who?

    I don't know...oh wait, he is on third.

    Sean got it !! 😀

    __________________________________________________

    Against stupidity the gods themselves contend in vain. -- Friedrich Schiller
    Stop, children, what's that sound? Everybody look what's going down. -- Stephen Stills

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