Are the posted questions getting worse?

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Are the posted questions getting worse?

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rodjkidd SSCoach Points: 15915 More actions · Answer 1

Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...

On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂

And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.

So we are moving in the right direction.

But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0

By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!

Cheers,

Rodders...

hvermaak Say Hey Kid Points: 672 More actions · Answer 2

I like the 3 envelop option...

Best line I've heard is we have SRM in place that is all the DR we need...

andrew gothard SSChampion Points: 12314 More actions · Answer 3

Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.

http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/2000-08-15/

I'm a DBA.
I'm not paid to solve problems. I'm paid to prevent them.

Dwain Camps SSC Guru Points: 86948 More actions · Answer 4

andrew gothard (6/5/2013)
Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.
http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/2000-08-15/

I love Dilbert! That link is way to good to not be clickable:

http://dilbert.com/strips/comic/2000-08-15/

My mantra: No loops! No CURSORs! No RBAR! Hoo-uh![/I]
My thought question: Have you ever been told that your query runs too fast?

My advice:
INDEXing a poor-performing query is like putting sugar on cat food. Yeah, it probably tastes better but are you sure you want to eat it?
The path of least resistance can be a slippery slope. Take care that fixing your fixes of fixes doesn't snowball and end up costing you more than fixing the root cause would have in the first place.

Need to UNPIVOT? Why not CROSS APPLY VALUES instead?[/url]
Since random numbers are too important to be left to chance, let's generate some![/url]
Learn to understand recursive CTEs by example.[/url]
[url url=http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/St

Sioban Krzywicki One Orange Chip Points: 27770 More actions · Answer 5

rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...
On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂
And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.
So we are moving in the right direction.
But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0
By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!
Cheers,
Rodders...

Didn't Elvis Costello die in a plane crash in the 50s? :w00t:

--------------------------------------
When you encounter a problem, if the solution isn't readily evident go back to the start and check your assumptions.
--------------------------------------
It’s unpleasantly like being drunk.
What’s so unpleasant about being drunk?
You ask a glass of water. -- Douglas Adams

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 6

Jeff Moden (6/4/2013)
Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.
My plan is to first get 3 envelopes...
(+100 if you get that one, as well) 😀

I love that joke and I use it regularly. 😀

_______________________________________________________________

Need help? Help us help you.

Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.

Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.

Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/

rodjkidd SSCoach Points: 15915 More actions · Answer 7

Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...
On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂
And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.
So we are moving in the right direction.
But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0
By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!
Cheers,
Rodders...
Didn't Elvis Costello die in a plane crash in the 50s? :w00t:

Oh dear Stefan... 🙁

SQLRNNR SSC Guru Points: 281334 More actions · Answer 8

Sean Lange (6/5/2013)
Jeff Moden (6/4/2013)
Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.
My plan is to first get 3 envelopes...
(+100 if you get that one, as well) 😀
I love that joke and I use it regularly. 😀

Raises hand and asks

Please splain?

Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
_______________________________________________
I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
SQL RNNR
Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
Learn Extended Events

Sioban Krzywicki One Orange Chip Points: 27770 More actions · Answer 9

rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...
On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂
And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.
So we are moving in the right direction.
But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0
By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!
Cheers,
Rodders...
Didn't Elvis Costello die in a plane crash in the 50s? :w00t:
Oh dear Stefan... 🙁

I've always thought Elvis Costello desperately wanted to be Buddy Holly.

--------------------------------------
When you encounter a problem, if the solution isn't readily evident go back to the start and check your assumptions.
--------------------------------------
It’s unpleasantly like being drunk.
What’s so unpleasant about being drunk?
You ask a glass of water. -- Douglas Adams

rodjkidd SSCoach Points: 15915 More actions · Answer 10

Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...
On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂
And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.
So we are moving in the right direction.
But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0
By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!
Cheers,
Rodders...
Didn't Elvis Costello die in a plane crash in the 50s? :w00t:
Oh dear Stefan... 🙁
I've always thought Elvis Costello desperately wanted to be Buddy Holly.

Oh right I see now 😉

I guess so, sometimes. Never really thought about!

Rodders...

Jack Corbett SSC Guru Points: 184394 More actions · Answer 11

SQLRNNR (6/5/2013)
Sean Lange (6/5/2013)
Jeff Moden (6/4/2013)
Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.
My plan is to first get 3 envelopes...
(+100 if you get that one, as well) 😀
I love that joke and I use it regularly. 😀
Raises hand and asks
Please splain?

+1 as I don't get the reference either.

Jack Corbett
Consultant - Straight Path Solutions
Check out these links on how to get faster and more accurate answers:
Forum Etiquette: How to post data/code on a forum to get the best help
Need an Answer? Actually, No ... You Need a Question

ChrisM@Work SSC Guru Points: 186127 More actions · Answer 12

Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Stefan Krzywicki (6/5/2013)
rodjkidd (6/5/2013)
Wow looked as though I missed some thread activity last night while seeing Elvis Costello in concert...
On the plus side at current job, they have been in a lot of flux, and they have 2 new starters + 1 to come, in my team, and a couple of new Prod DBA's who are very savvy - obviously I'm not including myself in that! 🙂
And we are all raising the issues with the current foot print and where servers are physically etc. Was in one meeting where a BA brought up the subject first. Which was nice.
So we are moving in the right direction.
But... This does depend on nothing major happening bewteen now and when we have a DR strategy in place :-0
By the way, Elvis was good. There was even an Ant & Dec joke... For those who don't know Ant & Dec - be thankful, very thankful!
Cheers,
Rodders...
Didn't Elvis Costello die in a plane crash in the 50s? :w00t:
Oh dear Stefan... 🙁
I've always thought Elvis Costello desperately wanted to be Buddy Holly.

Was Buddy Holly a detective? Elvis Costelloe is always watching them.

^{“Write the query the simplest way. If through testing it becomes clear that the performance is inadequate, consider alternative query forms.” - Gail Shaw}

For fast, accurate and documented assistance in answering your questions, please read this article.
Understanding and using APPLY, (I) and (II) Paul White
Hidden RBAR: Triangular Joins / The "Numbers" or "Tally" Table: What it is and how it replaces a loop Jeff Moden

Sean Lange SSC Guru Points: 286590 More actions · Answer 13

Jack Corbett (6/5/2013)
SQLRNNR (6/5/2013)
Sean Lange (6/5/2013)
Jeff Moden (6/4/2013)
Brandie Tarvin (6/4/2013)
My Recovery Plan
1) SCREAM really loudly so everyone knows there is a problem.
2) Run out of the building as fast as possible.
3) Update my resume.
4) Job hunt.
5) Repeat as needed.
My plan is to first get 3 envelopes...
(+100 if you get that one, as well) 😀
I love that joke and I use it regularly. 😀
Raises hand and asks
Please splain?
+1 as I don't get the reference either.

OK here we go...sorry to spoil it Jeff.

A fellow had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech corporation. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes. "Open these if you run up against a problem you don't think you can solve," he said.
Well, things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales took a downturn and he was really catching a lot of heat. About at his wit's end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, "Blame your predecessor."
The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the press -- and Wall Street - responded positively, sales began to pick up and the problem was soon behind him.
About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in sales, combined with serious product problems. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize." This he did, and the company quickly rebounded.
After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times. The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope.
The message said, "Prepare three envelopes."