April 12, 2012 at 12:07 pm
Steve Jones - SSC Editor (4/12/2012)
Both printers here are acting up. One doesn't want to inject ink on the the paper. The other keeps sending offline messages to the computers.Today is a day I am tempted to throw one of them off the roof.
Okay, is this indirect-movie-reference day?
At lunch, I'm seeing headlines about some Senator claiming there are communists in the US Senate, and having visions of the original "The Manchurian Candidate" going through my head.
Now I've got "Office Space" playing as a double-bill with that. (It's an eclectic theatre in here.)
What's next?
- Gus "GSquared", RSVP, OODA, MAP, NMVP, FAQ, SAT, SQL, DNA, RNA, UOI, IOU, AM, PM, AD, BC, BCE, USA, UN, CF, ROFL, LOL, ETC
Property of The Thread
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everyone agrees it's old enough to know better." - Anon
April 12, 2012 at 12:08 pm
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?
Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
Gail Shaw
Microsoft Certified Master: SQL Server, MVP, M.Sc (Comp Sci)
SQL In The Wild: Discussions on DB performance with occasional diversions into recoverability
April 12, 2012 at 12:09 pm
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
Wow!
Just ...
Wow!
I ...
Wow!
Loss for words. (Except a few more "wow"s maybe.)
- Gus "GSquared", RSVP, OODA, MAP, NMVP, FAQ, SAT, SQL, DNA, RNA, UOI, IOU, AM, PM, AD, BC, BCE, USA, UN, CF, ROFL, LOL, ETC
Property of The Thread
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everyone agrees it's old enough to know better." - Anon
April 12, 2012 at 12:15 pm
GSquared (4/12/2012)
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
Wow!
Just ...
Wow!
I ...
Wow!
Loss for words. (Except a few more "wow"s maybe.)
I am dealing with a worse one: I am rewriting (someone's) SELECT that as one of the things in the select list has a UDF that contains a SELECT. That thing is processing 15M rows...
April 12, 2012 at 12:18 pm
Revenant (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
Wow!
Just ...
Wow!
I ...
Wow!
Loss for words. (Except a few more "wow"s maybe.)
I am dealing with a worse one: I am rewriting (someone's) SELECT that as one of the things in the select list has a UDF that contains a SELECT. That thing is processing 15M rows...
Brain-spill on aisle 2. Cleanup to aisle 2.
You just made my head explode.
Edit: But Gail's still gets first prize. Yours is just bad coding practices. Her example is worthy of TheDailyWTF.
- Gus "GSquared", RSVP, OODA, MAP, NMVP, FAQ, SAT, SQL, DNA, RNA, UOI, IOU, AM, PM, AD, BC, BCE, USA, UN, CF, ROFL, LOL, ETC
Property of The Thread
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everyone agrees it's old enough to know better." - Anon
April 12, 2012 at 12:24 pm
GSquared (4/12/2012)
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
I'm getting very frustrated (and very saddened) by the (apparently) increasing number of people who seem to feel that writing T-SQL is about throwing code segments together at random apparently believing that some odd combination of clauses will work and not checking in the documentation to see what the syntax permits when their random combination of fragments of multiple commands doesn't work.Am I alone here?
Like the people who put "If Else" in the Where clause?
Or the ones who use IsNumeric and end up still getting conversion errors?
Or do you have something more specific in mind?
I like the GO inside of IF ELSE contructs.
April 12, 2012 at 12:24 pm
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Revenant (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
Wow!
Just ...
Wow!
I ...
Wow!
Loss for words. (Except a few more "wow"s maybe.)
I am dealing with a worse one: I am rewriting (someone's) SELECT that as one of the things in the select list has a UDF that contains a SELECT. That thing is processing 15M rows...
Brain-spill on aisle 2. Cleanup to aisle 2.
You just made my head explode.
Edit: But Gail's still gets first prize. Yours is just bad coding practices. Her example is worthy of TheDailyWTF.
Yes, it is. But I sort-of like it because it makes me look good when I cut the daily run time from 20 hours to 4, including transfer of the source file.
April 12, 2012 at 12:31 pm
Steve Jones - SSC Editor (4/12/2012)
Both printers here are acting up. One doesn't want to inject ink on the the paper. The other keeps sending offline messages to the computers.Today is a day I am tempted to throw one of them off the roof.
Don't throw it off the roof.
Launch it with a pigeon launcher and shoot it.
Repeat
Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
_______________________________________________
I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
SQL RNNR
Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
Learn Extended Events
April 12, 2012 at 12:32 pm
Lynn Pettis (4/12/2012)
What would happen here on SSC if the TOP 25 posters did nothing but lurk for 24 hours?
Then there would be several of the rest of us who would suddenly have to try to handle a lot more posts. Being 37th overall and 36th on forums I guess I don't get to lurk. I want my chance too!!! :w00t:
_______________________________________________________________
Need help? Help us help you.
Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.
Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/
April 12, 2012 at 12:33 pm
SQLRNNR (4/12/2012)
Steve Jones - SSC Editor (4/12/2012)
Both printers here are acting up. One doesn't want to inject ink on the the paper. The other keeps sending offline messages to the computers.Today is a day I am tempted to throw one of them off the roof.
Don't throw it off the roof.
Launch it with a pigeon launcher and shoot it.
Repeat
Maybe Jeff can use it as a porkchop target???
_______________________________________________________________
Need help? Help us help you.
Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.
Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/
April 12, 2012 at 12:33 pm
GilaMonster (4/12/2012)
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Or do you have something more specific in mind?Today's example:
SELECT <stuff> FROM
Table1
inner join (SELECT <more stuff> INTO #Temp FROM AnotherTable) ON <join clause>
inner join (....repeat several more subqueries with into clauses ...)
bahahahaha
I must find that thread
Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
_______________________________________________
I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
SQL RNNR
Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
Learn Extended Events
April 12, 2012 at 12:35 pm
Sean Lange (4/12/2012)
SQLRNNR (4/12/2012)
Steve Jones - SSC Editor (4/12/2012)
Both printers here are acting up. One doesn't want to inject ink on the the paper. The other keeps sending offline messages to the computers.Today is a day I am tempted to throw one of them off the roof.
Don't throw it off the roof.
Launch it with a pigeon launcher and shoot it.
Repeat
Maybe Jeff can use it as a porkchop target???
that would be good too.
I'm thinking maybe launching it, then shooting it with exploding tip bolts shot from the crossbow.
Jason...AKA CirqueDeSQLeil
_______________________________________________
I have given a name to my pain...MCM SQL Server, MVP
SQL RNNR
Posting Performance Based Questions - Gail Shaw[/url]
Learn Extended Events
April 12, 2012 at 12:38 pm
Sean Lange (4/12/2012)
Lynn Pettis (4/12/2012)
What would happen here on SSC if the TOP 25 posters did nothing but lurk for 24 hours?Then there would be several of the rest of us who would suddenly have to try to handle a lot more posts. Being 37th overall and 36th on forums I guess I don't get to lurk. I want my chance too!!! :w00t:
If you want to join the Lurker for a Day group, please do. We just need to schedule and advertise it. No wait, if we advertise it we won't get the effect we are after.
April 12, 2012 at 12:44 pm
Lynn Pettis (4/12/2012)
What would happen here on SSC if the TOP 25 posters did nothing but lurk for 24 hours?
I'm in the top 25 (usually in the top 10), and I'm not sure what you mean. I lurk on here all the time. Last time, my lurking lasted almost 10 minutes! (Personal record! Break out the champagne! Then figure out something to do with it, since I don't drink.)
- Gus "GSquared", RSVP, OODA, MAP, NMVP, FAQ, SAT, SQL, DNA, RNA, UOI, IOU, AM, PM, AD, BC, BCE, USA, UN, CF, ROFL, LOL, ETC
Property of The Thread
"Nobody knows the age of the human race, but everyone agrees it's old enough to know better." - Anon
April 12, 2012 at 12:45 pm
GSquared (4/12/2012)
Lynn Pettis (4/12/2012)
What would happen here on SSC if the TOP 25 posters did nothing but lurk for 24 hours?I'm in the top 25 (usually in the top 10), and I'm not sure what you mean. I lurk on here all the time. Last time, my lurking lasted almost 10 minutes! (Personal record! Break out the champagne! Then figure out something to do with it, since I don't drink.)
I drink enough to make up for both you and Lynn. 😉
_______________________________________________________________
Need help? Help us help you.
Read the article at http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Best+Practices/61537/ for best practices on asking questions.
Need to split a string? Try Jeff Modens splitter http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Tally+Table/72993/.
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 1 – Converting Rows to Columns - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/T-SQL/63681/
Cross Tabs and Pivots, Part 2 - Dynamic Cross Tabs - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/Crosstab/65048/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 1) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69953/
Understanding and Using APPLY (Part 2) - http://www.sqlservercentral.com/articles/APPLY/69954/
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