A Welcome Delay

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A Welcome Delay

Steve Jones - SSC Editor

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November 29, 2007 at 3:36 pm

#181825

Comments posted to this topic are about the item A Welcome Delay

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Sarah Dutkiewicz SSCommitted Points: 1870 More actions · Answer 1

I definitely pause before sending emails (and even making posts). I tend to read, proofread, re-read and then send. I proof my emails because I don't always know who's on the other side and if they are as picky as me. I tend to get cranky when I know the person on the other side is someone who writes for the public (like a PR person or marketing person) and who has horrible typos and grammar. Seeing emails like that makes me lose faith in the school systems here 🙁

Jeff Moden SSC Guru Points: 1004354 More actions · Answer 2

Heh... at the very least, I'll go outside to have a smoke before I hit the "GO" button. Gives me time to think about whether I need to reword to be more politically correct or maybe even time to ask did I understand the problem correctly. It's especially important if you really want to crush someone's itty-bitty head because they said something in their email that was really stupid. 😛

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majorbloodnock SSCrazy Eights Points: 9389 More actions · Answer 3

Certainly the wider the audience or the more controversial the subject, the more care I'll take in composing and checking the email. However, I can't say I delay the sending of potentially inflammatory emails, since I don't tend to use email as the preferred medium for that kind of communication. If I want to get angry with someone, I tend to pick up the phone or wander over and talk face to face.

I'm just a great believer in public praise, but private criticism.

Semper in excretia, suus solum profundum variat

Jamie Batiste SSCommitted Points: 1880 More actions · Answer 4

I've done both. Generally I try to stop posting inflammatory emails until I've tried to understand the intended meaning but sometimes even carefully crafted emails can be misconstrued with the lack of a comma in the right place etc. I still prefer to speak face to face to ensure that what I mean to say comes through and that I understand fully the other parties intent.

I worked for a private bank a few years ago, with a very friendly close knit staff. A colleague sent an email out basically warning of an impending lack of service to the entire bank. One member of staff replied with a one word reply implying that he was born out of wedlock. It would have been funny to both parties and no harm done...but he hit reply to all instead of reply and didn't notice until the replies started flooding in. If this had been other sites I'd worked at there would have been fireworks, but luckily everyone viewed the incident as a joke.

Todd Townley Ten Centuries Points: 1320 More actions · Answer 5

I am VERY careful with any emails I send. As too many stories attest to, an email can end up in some of the strangest places either through carelessness, hitting the Replay All instead of Reply, or even someone forwarding your email to someone else.

Even in writing emails intended to stay internal to the company that may contain criticism of a fellow employee or a customer, I attempt to keep the language professional and courteous.

Also, I am in a position where I have had the need to review the emails of employees who have been let go. Needless to say, there are often emails in the mailbox that could potentially be embarrassing for both the former employee and for senders / recipients who are still current employees.

In short, my philosophy is that EVERY email is “on the record”. If I need to say something that I wouldn’t want published everywhere, then say it in person, but don’t put it in writing.

Grant Fritchey SSC Guru Points: 398882 More actions · Answer 6

Having sent a few e-bombs in my time, I try hard to look at what I've written before I hit send if emotion is an attachment. Usually, if I'm completely ripped and writing an email, just writing the email is enough to calm me down. I'll read it once or twice to be sure I've gotten my precise response for the idiot that I was going to send it to. Then I hit delete.

"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
- Theodore Roosevelt

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Stephanie J Brown Hall of Fame Points: 3896 More actions · Answer 7

Having been on the receiving end of quite a few "flamers", I wish everyone would take that time-out before hitting send on the emotional or political emails. (One particular correspondent was very pleasant in person, but the emails - wow!) My personal policy is never flame, and if you're responding to an "annoying" email, always read it at least twice, and if it's really touchy have a co-worker review it with you for tone. Because you only hit SEND once, and there is no UNSend! 😀

Here there be dragons...,

Steph Brown

Jack Corbett SSC Guru Points: 184394 More actions · Answer 8

Grant Fritchey (11/30/2007)
Having sent a few e-bombs in my time, I try hard to look at what I've written before I hit send if emotion is an attachment. Usually, if I'm completely ripped and writing an email, just writing the email is enough to calm me down. I'll read it once or twice to be sure I've gotten my precise response for the idiot that I was going to send it to. Then I hit delete.

Grant,

You hit what I do right on the head. I can't redo a phone conversation, but I can re-type an email before I send it. This is a major reason why I choose email over the telephone. Write, read, and edit so I can get my point across, hopefully without coming across like a jerk.

Jack Corbett
Consultant - Straight Path Solutions
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Grant Fritchey SSC Guru Points: 398882 More actions · Answer 9

The real problem is, I am a jerk. So I have to try to reduce the damage as much as possible. Emails are dangerous because, even a well crafted message can offend (especially when so many people these days seem to lack an epidermis).

"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
- Theodore Roosevelt

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Your Name Here SSCrazy Points: 2344 More actions · Answer 10

Ohhhh, yeah. It only takes one hard lesson to learn you don't blast out flame mail when your temperature is high. As other folks have posted (clearly from wisdom gained through experience) it's probably best to write what you feel, take relish is verbally crushing "their itty bitty head" then lock your workstation and take a smoke break. When you return, hit the delete button and reply with a cooler head. If you really stop to think about it, sending flame mail usually just stokes the fire and makes things worse.

I've actually seen email threads that I replied to circulate over a year after I replied to them. It's really sobering to see your words in an email dated that far back!

Be the better person and compose your mail calmly and civilly while entertaining the thoughts of using a nail gun on a voodoo doll that bears a remarkable resemblance to the recipient. Personally, I'd rather be laughing than angry.

Timothy-313907 Ten Centuries Points: 1226 More actions · Answer 11

I got burned, twice, by a (former) friend/co-worker from sending her nasty emails that she then dutifully forwarded to my boss. :pinch: I've always thought myself to be careful when it comes to online communications, but after those incidents I don't trust ANYONE and I consider anything I write as something that can be used against me in the court of public opinion. Even if you're the best of friends now emails can be saved, or just left in your inbox, and months or years later, surprise surprise. 🙂 Best to leave emotion out of written communications in my opinion unless you don't mind any potential future consequences, or use an online alias. 😀

For general email though I always proofread what I've written and spellcheck. Spellcheck catches most egregious mistakes but I tell you grammar is the killer for most things I read. People use the wrong form of they're, their, or there. Forget to include words they may have been thinking but just forgot to actually write. Use an incorrect word, that's spelled correctly, for the concept they're trying to convey. What's worse is that I've seen bad grammar mistakes in official articles from sources such as Reuters or the AP. You'd think editors would proofread their writers' work.

Anyway, after that long spiel about grammar I'm now extremely self-conscious I've gotten my grammar right in this post, haha.

Julie Breutzmann Hall of Fame Points: 3637 More actions · Answer 12

It occurs to me that this was his toned-down version of the email. It seems likely that his first reaction would have been much stronger.

It is prudent to double-check the "to" list, reread emails and to delay sending ones that may cause trouble. And to always be aware that emails may not remain private. But even the best of us slip up now and then.

WILLIAM MITCHELL SSChampion Points: 13766 More actions · Answer 13

Steve, you said

"CEO of Mandriva fired off an open letter ... The tone of the letter was a little whiny..."

But did you consider that English may be his 2nd language? Maybe something was lost in translation.

I don't speak French, so perhaps somebody else could comment on the French version?

Joe Johnson-482549 SSC Eights! Points: 916 More actions · Answer 14

In an emotional situation, I always write the email immediately, but keep it in my drafts until the next day before sending it. In many instances, I look at it the same day and say, "What the @#$! was I thinking?". There have been times that I have gone ahead and sent the email (with minor editing).

I think it depends on the situation on whether you should send them, but you should always remove the emotions from the situation -- it can only make it worse.

Regards,

J.