October 29, 2008 at 6:28 am
Very good Shaun, very creative... but speaking as a manager, you missed two scenes... This earlier one...
Manager: I'm going to need a copy of your six month objectives, and also a report on how you screwed up with this recent server overhaul.
DBA: Sure... Sure Danny, you can have that... (pause)... But you gotta ask me nicely.
Manager: I'm sorry?
DBA: You can have all the objectives and reports on how I screwed up you want - but you gotta ask me nicely!
Manager: General DBA, sir... Might I have a copy of your six month objectives, and the report on how you almost put us out of business recently?
DBA: Why sure Danny, my underling will run you by my cubicle this morning and see you get all the paper work you need.
...and of course this portion of the scene Shaun didnt include....
Manager: Did you order the T-SQL code font red?
DBA: You're goddamn right I did!
(long pause, manager looks at VP...)
Manager: Jack?
(VP Jack, sad, but aware DBA has just sunk himself, nods his head in the affirmative...)
Manager: I believe we need to get over to Human Resources and begin a 526 termination process, the DBA has rights.
VP Jack: DBA, its my duty to inform you that you are hereby fired.
DBA: (angry, intense, to manager) Boy, I am going to tear off your head and spit down your neck!!!
Manager: (in DBA's face...) Goddamn DBA's - prima donnas one and all - No DBA, you are going to leave this place and hopefully learn that you are not above anyone in this business - we're a team and we dont work for you, you work WITH us! At least you are supposed to!
( Weeks later after DBA has visited unemployment office )
DBA: Would you like fries and can I super-size that for you sir?
McDonald's Customer: Yeah, sure, that sounds fine.
Touche!!! 😀
October 29, 2008 at 6:34 am
Absolutely... hilarious that made my day, well done Shaun.
October 29, 2008 at 6:41 am
Grant Fritchey (10/29/2008)
Does this mean I get to carry a gun at work now?
I'm and old IBM 1130 hack. A buddy of mine who was, at the time, a comm center specialist in Vietnam sent me a very cryptic letter. It was and IBM part number. What the ...? I looked it up. It's a bracket that bolts to the side of the CPU console. It's a holder for a Thompson .45 caliber sub-machine gun :w00t: Talk a bout defending your data!
ATBCharles Kincaid
October 29, 2008 at 6:47 am
No guns at work. Chances are we're run out of developers and have to go code things ourselves. Now truncheons....
I thought this was a little silly shooting the podcast, or maybe that was me. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks Shaun!
October 29, 2008 at 6:48 am
All jokes aside, we here in South Africa only watched the final of Survivor Fiji last night and I must say that I was so sorry that Yauman was voted out. I hoped he would win it.
Thanks, dude. I was going to watch that one tonight.
October 29, 2008 at 6:50 am
Charles,
You'll have to send me that part number...I've been looking for one of those. 🙂
I saw a pull-mechanism for a lawn mower sitting in a guys office one day (I think he had just replaced it and brought it in from home), so we mounted it to his old machine as a joke about how you had to pull it to get the thing started each morning (it was fairly slow and outdated).
It apparently helped, because his boss (finally) got him a new machine about two months later.
--Andrew
October 29, 2008 at 6:59 am
I didn't expect there to be a video version of the podcast today (since there wasn't yesterday), but just watched it...hillarious!
"Steve Jones, I've met Jack Nicholson, and you, sir, are no Jack Nicholson" 😉
Awesome, keep up the good work Steve and Shaun! (Man, I really need to get my camera back up and running so I can get in there and show you how it's done.) 😛
--Andrew
October 29, 2008 at 7:03 am
It's funny because it's true... 🙂
But, alas, it must be said: Shades of Terry Childs...
October 29, 2008 at 7:07 am
I love it!!! It is great!!!!!
October 29, 2008 at 7:15 am
Steve Jones - Editor (10/29/2008)
No guns at work. Chances are we're run out of developers and have to go code things ourselves. Now truncheons....I thought this was a little silly shooting the podcast, or maybe that was me. Glad you enjoyed it and thanks Shaun!
Oooh! I can do truncheons, not a problem.
"The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood"
- Theodore Roosevelt
Author of:
SQL Server Execution Plans
SQL Server Query Performance Tuning
October 29, 2008 at 7:26 am
Keller (10/29/2008)
Charles,You'll have to send me that part number...I've been looking for one of those. 🙂
[snip]
--Andrew
I could look it up for you, but then I'd have to ... On second thought.
ATBCharles Kincaid
October 29, 2008 at 7:33 am
Sorry, I thought that was kind of cheesy.
October 29, 2008 at 7:35 am
Mmmm....cheese.
October 29, 2008 at 9:14 am
SIR – YES SIR
RegardsRudy KomacsarSenior Database Administrator"Ave Caesar! - Morituri te salutamus."
October 29, 2008 at 9:18 am
Phew, where did that come from? Someone is having a bad day.
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