feresy – n. the fear that your partner is changing in ways you don’t understand, even though they might be changes for the better, because it forces you to wonder whether your relationship needs a few careful nudges to fall back into balance, or perhaps is still as stable as ever, but involves a person who no longer exists.
I used to experience feresy, worried that my wife, or even I, were changing in ways that might make us move further apart. Over time, I’ve learned that we both will change, and we have to accept the other will grow and change. They aren’t the same person we married, nor are they someone we can force to change in the way we want.
However, if there is a balance adjustment needed, we both know we need to communicate to ensure that we maintain a strong partnership.
I don’t fear my wife not being the person she was because that person no longer exists.
From the Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows